OCD Floor

I’m working in a building where the elevator floor has some sort of synthetic tile laid down. So far, so good. But you’re supposed to grout that shit! It’s like standing on an artfully placed pile of old broken plates. I know, I know, first world problem and all that. But I just hate seeing an incomplete job. What happened? Were they working along installing tile when someone said “fuck it, workday’s done” and then they skipped town? Did someone pay a contractor in advance? (Also, one of the tiles is already broken.)

This is irrelevant and I don’t know if it’ll show up on the photos but trust me, there’s a 1/4″ gap between every damn one of them. It pisses me off and I’m not entirely sure why. I’ve half a mind to buy some materials and finish the job in a clandestine grout application attack. Possibly while wearing a cape. It’s  bird, it’s a plane, it’s GROUTMAN!

About AdaptiveCurmudgeon

Adaptive Curmudgeon is handsome, brave, and wise.
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14 Responses to OCD Floor

  1. Anonymous says:

    Heck, a 1/4″ gap is probably enough for a lebanese squirrel to escape through!

  2. Mark Matis says:

    Feel free to delete either. Your site host didn’t display the first as “waiting for moderation” when I originally posted it, and it was still missing this morning, so I went and done it again!

    Sure is interesting how conservative web sites are having problems these days. But then I’m sure it’s just a coinky-dink…

  3. Mark Matis says:

    Actually, it most likely isn’t YOUR fault. When I post, the comment normally shows immediately with a note about “awaiting moderation” or some such language. I got that when I made the second post this morning, but not yesterday when I made the first one. And when it had not shown up with that text this morning, I figgered it had got lost in space. I’m reasonably certain that it requires no action on your part to get that “awaiting moderation”. You have to act to make it visible to the rest of your loyal followers, of course, but not for that first part.

    • AdaptiveCurmudgeon says:

      Correct. I have no idea what voodoo happens to make “awaiting moderation” to line up in my buffer. Probably a simple glitch somewhere. Maybe the NSA needed to install a new router.

      I hope folks don’t mind a long turnover on comments. Sometimes I ask for help (technically my dog is the chief editor) to approve comments in my absence but not too often.

      • Mark Matis says:

        This is YOUR site. Run it as you wish. Unless, of course, you’re being compensated for it by Uncle Sugar. In such a case, they 1st Amendment would supposedly apply. But when you’re no longer under Rule of Law, well, anything goes…

  4. Any elevator that fucked up and I would want to see the cabling and motor on it. Whoever does maintenance, etc in that building is fucked up..and you never know how fucked up the really vital parts of it might be.
    I don’t care to take a dive vertically at the speed of gravity.

    • AdaptiveCurmudgeon says:

      You can forget “asking” about details. Whomever does maintenance lives in a different dimension of time and space from the people actually at the hotel. If I asked the simians at the front desk about maintenance they’d collapse in the agony of a brain aneurysm. They probably think the elevator is run by magic elves.

      There are some really dumb people out there and they seem to work at the front desk of every hotel where I’m trying to check in. It’s amazing. I can’t quite grok how some of them manage to dress themselves in the morning. They are (presumably) literate enough to operate the POS terminal and they look vaguely mannequin like (i.e. more or less presentable), but then they get every goddamn thing wrong about every goddamn transaction. This is an actual exchange from the last trip:

      Dumbass employee: “Here are your keys Mr. Curmudgeon.”
      Me: “Thanks, can I see a printout of my receipt?”
      Dumbass employee clicks 293 buttons, disappears into a back room for 10 minutes, and returns with the printout.
      Me: “This is nice but you got some stuff wrong.”
      Dumbass employee: “Oh no. What’s incorrect?”
      Me: “You misspelled my name, have an incorrect address, the vehicle information is wrong, you have the wrong checkout date, and the hotel loyalty card number is missing.”
      Dumbass employee: “Ha ha ha… well at least I got today right.”
      Me: “Today is Monday.”
      Dumbass employee: Looking crestfallen. “Sigh.”

  5. John Matus says:

    From the picture that looks like some kind of laminate flooring, not tile. Even so it should have been started from the back of the elevator laminate or tile.

    • AdaptiveCurmudgeon says:

      Yeah that’s the word; “laminate”. It’s definitely not tile.

      Also, the hotel’s lobby is done in the stuff and that is installed properly. It doesn’t look bad.

      It’s just the elevator where they dropped the ball.

      • John Matus says:

        Laminate flooring actually locks each piece together. There should be NO gaps of any kind in a laminate floor. This stuff is so easy to do that they teach 1 hour classes on how to do it at Home Depot and Lowes.

  6. Tennessee Budd says:

    When you have an engineering degree, you have the type of mind that gets really pissed off at such things, or maybe that’s “when you’re fucked up in the head”.
    Come to think of it (mine’s in electronics), what’s the difference?

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