All last week the “news” kept braying about SNAP would be interrupted if the “shutdown” wasn’t resolved. As usual, this tiny interruption was presented as the end of life as we know it.
Unfortunately, I lived through 2020. After COVID I don’t see the world the same. I no longer reject the idea of huge groups of people irrationally losing their shit over things I consider minor. On Halloween I ventured into Walmart and bought groceries “just in case” everyone loses their Goddamn mind. (I did the same “pre-bullshit shopping before COVID” and it turned out to be a good call). I don’t like Walmart but it was surprisingly civilized.
Back at home it turned to November 1 and I “tuned in” to see what happened. There were three options:
- SNAP was interrupted; with or without a pants shitting hysteria and Baltimore imploding.
- SNAP was not interrupted; with or without a pants shitting hysteria and Portland continuing to implode.
- A mix of #1 and #2. SNAP was interrupted in some places and not in others. Then I could amuse myself mapping out which states and cities were losing their fucking minds and which were inhabited by sane people.
(There’s a fourth option which I hadn’t considered.
Radio silence.
What the fuck?
Not one source of “news” reported SNAP is still running. Not one source of “news” reported SNAP is interrupted. It’s “Schrodinger’s News”, it is simultaneously interrupted and not. Whichever flake a person out the most is what they believe.
I’d give my left nut for just one “reporter” to post an article that goes like this: “I’m here with Sally Sobstory at the local Dollar Store in location X. She’s trying to buy a six pack of Monster energy drinks and a bag of Doritos using her SNAP (EBT?) card. And the rseult is…”
I had popcorn ready to go!
The best I got is “some random judge in Rhode Island ordered the president, who doesn’t have the authority to spend money not allocated by Congress to spend the money which Congress has not allocated, because penumbras and emanations and shit.” Even that is inconclusive. If a judge says something it doesn’t immediately follow that the thing is done. “A judge in Rhode Island just ordered that Trump shove a kazoo up his ass… we turn now to CNN which has a camera setup to view the…”
I’ve given up trying to figure it out. It’s day 34 of the “shutdown” and it seems somewhat unrelated to reality. Some folks are going without a paycheck, which is something we’ve all experienced at one time or another. Most people aren’t missing their “services”, or if they are I’m not hearing much about it. (The “press” yaps about “air traffic controllers calling in sick to deliver Doordash” but I don’t buy it. It feels like they found the only job that everyone can understand as essential. If there’s someone smart enough to be an air traffic controller and stupidly desperate enough to need Doordash cash just to get through the day, that’s a person with issues. They’ve got gambling debts or a cocaine habit or buy too many Hummel figurines on Amazon. Such a person is probably unstable. They shouldn’t be trusted with flight routing. Also, a whole lotta’ Feds aren’t air traffic controllers.)
Meanwhile it’s day 3 of “SNAP might be interrupted but I guess it’s not. At least nobody is saying “it actually happened”.
Nor do I know how a judge can order the Executive to expend funds which Congress didn’t allocate. But it could be a thing. Maybe there’s some clause somewhere I don’t yet know about.
UPDATE:
I figured it out!
The longest “shutdown” ever was 35 days; December 22, 2018 through January 25, 2019.
If the “shutdown” ends today it won’t be “the worst ever”. Logically, it’s gotta’ go at least another day or two to “set a record”.
I didn’t realize how close we were to greatness.
Well done everyone! I like to see people reach for the stars. Congress is really outdoing itself with a record length “shutdown”. Impressive! You popped my corn fellas!
A record “shutdown” is so awesome that the “press” might stop talking about “balls” (or “ballrooms”. Frankly that’s a shame because I was enjoying talk of ballrooms.
A.C.
P.S. I will leap with joy like nobody ever has if the newly constructed ballroom is opened with this song:
The average pay for Air Traffic Controller is around $145,000, low end $94,000 and high end over $174,000. They have experienced a few shutdowns. None of them have a backup money plan?
I believe the unions are telling some to call in sick and are probably paying them on the side.
The unions are another democrat money slush fund.
I don’t think a union slush fund in necessary. I think 99% of Air Traffic Controllers can handle a delayed paycheck but nobody cares about that. Either 1% are weird, actually broke, or just letting the press exaggerate life’s hassles.
“Hi. I’m the press and my goal is to blame Trump for everything from inflation to soggy cereal. You’re an air traffic controller who clears 150 large per year. You’ve missed two paychecks in the last eight years. You’re surely desperate. Are you missing medical treatments? Did you sell a kidney on E-Bay?”
“Well it’s kind of a pain in the ass. I have to make payments on my Audi and so…”
“Are you delivering Doordash to make end’s meet?”
“What? I mean it’s a hassle but…”
“Trump is making you deliver Chinese food? The bastard!”
“I’m a highly specialized professional. You know I’m not a janitor right? I don’t have to…”
“You’re delivering Big Macs in your Audi aren’t you?
“Sure, fine… I’m starving to death, I’m delivering Big Macs to survive, I sold my cat for medical experiments, and Trump pissed in my roses this morning. Is that what you want to hear?”
“I knew it! We’re running the story!”
Does anyone remember what President Reagan did to PATCO???
I remember that. (For those of you who don’t, air traffic controllers went on strike and Reagan fired them for it.)
People get their SNAP benefits once a month but it is not on the first day of the month. It depends on when you applied and also how the state administers it. Most get their SNAP between the 4th and the 20th of each month.
I did not know that.
I believe the judge’s ruling was that as USDA is an executive branch agency, Trump can order them to release some of their existing emergency funds to cover SNAP…. There doesn’t need to be appropriation of congressional funds…or something like that. That might buy them a month…..
Differ
You might have used a trigger warning about Hummel figurines. The saccharine sweetness and ungodly cuteness designed to appeal to 50 year old cat ladies and flamboyantly gay aging 80 year old men is too much for me first thing in the morning before breakfast.
Simply knowing about them makes me suspicious about the validity of your man card.
Unless you buy them up and use them as targets on the front lawn in preparation for the Zombie/EBT apocalypse? The only valid use for them I can see, in which case upgrade your man card to platinum status. >};o)
Phil B
If you peer into the abyss, a Hummel figurine peers back at you.
Pretty sure the collection of taxes did not shutdown.