We walk our own path; often while hearing the fading echoes of the canyon where we started.
If you start out poor, or with small horizons, or behind the eight ball, you don’t have to stay that way. But it matters. Statistically, what’s initially unattainable, tends to remain unlikely. I never let that bother me. Indeed I’ve done tons of shit that seemed impossible right up until I did it.
Where I’m going with this is that I was born to a world where Hawaii might as well be on Mars. It simply didn’t exist for me. It didn’t exist for anyone I knew. I expected it to always be that way.
Then, I was there.
God it was beautiful! I’m shocked and deeply grateful for my good fortune.
I was in unofficial recuperation. Mrs. Curmudgeon, who wasn’t there to properly monitor me, deeply stressed that normal people “vacation” while I “adventure”. Given I’d been sicker than a dog could I just “calm the fuck down and not go fight sharks or whatever“? She’s a wise woman. I did my best to “vacation”; texting silly things like “still no sharks, snoozing in shade of palm tree“.
It worked. I needed a break and the rest did me good. I’ll be back to my old self “fighting sharks” some other day.
Thinking about how Hawaii seemed so exotic and unattainable reminded me of my only real connection with the place… Magnum PI! Back when TV was TV, and people watched TV, and America had a shared culture, there was one moustache that ruled all.
Magnum PI was pure prime-time fun. My young Gen-X future-Curmudgeon self gleefully watched every episode. Pre-Quigley Tom Sellek was perpetually awesome. He lived in paradise. He never had to shovel snow. The writers came up with a ridiculous work-around so boy-ish Sellek could drive the hottest car of the time and still claim to be broke. He flounced around with bikinis and Berettas and got free rides on T.C.’s colorful helicopter. Seriously, he was even named “Magnum”. Who has a name that cool?
I fuckin’ loved Magnum’s frenemy Higgins too! Dude was uptight and boring but smarter than shit. The plot hinted he had a bad ass backstory, possibly even being the super rich Robin Masters who supposedly owned everything. (This was an afterthought and the writers couldn’t quite paper over a few plot holes, but what would be cooler than a wealthy nerd pretending to be his own employee?) Higgins had exquisitely trained death dogs (Zeus and Apollo) and randomly turned them loose on Magnum! Why? Because, just look at him! Magnum had it coming.
It all worked out in perfect balance; Magnum had a +2 moustache of persuasion but Higgins kindly kept the freeloading hippie humble. Glorious.
Anyway, here’s to the fun show that all kids of a certain age (Gen X) fondly remember.
Was a swabbie in the mid eighties at Pearl when he came by a celebrity softball game on base. Dude was a major league asshat and was mercilessly heckled by us dregs of society. All is never as it seems on the tube.
I was much the same way in regards to exotic places being totally out-of-reach, but wanted to stay away from them anyway. After being caught in a major down-point in my chosen college BS before the retirements opened positions, my “wish list” for Army postings were New York, Alaska, Germany and Greenland so of course they sent me to Hawaii.
Being poor in Hawaii wasn’t that great either, with everything off-post except at the Aloha Stadium Swapmeet and Ono Kine Grinds breakfast specials at Bent-over-the-pickle-barrel prices keeping you broke.
Being in “Paradise” sucks any motivation you have out of you, as there’s no pressure to get stuff that broke in winter fixed and the wood cut at the same time any building, growing, relaxing and breathing biting flies instead of ice crystals. That and after a month you’ve seen about everything and you’re stuck with the beach or the bar.
And my barracks-mate got hit on by Jim Nabors and a guy in our platoon pierced Ed McMahon’s nipples (with pictures as proof), they have a hockey rink, I found out Japan is like the PNW but with small people with tiny cars and Bosnia is like the Appalachians with cuckoo birds so Hawaii wasn’t all bad.
I’m lucky enough to have been to Hawaii twice in my life time. Once in 1991 (lucky Spring Break), the other my honeymoon in five years later. Beautiful place but Lord – who can afford to live there on a permanent basis !! You buy land over there by the cup …
I’ve seen it, cherish it but I have other places I want to see before I die. But a Bucket List place – yep.