For No Apparent Reason, I Went Camping: Part 6: Chuckbox

I meant to write about camping. I wrote about everything else. Meh.

Then, my in-box reported a few donations. I’m an easily motivated fool and wrote this post. After camping I’d wasted the opportunity to post a few happy photos and by golly I’d better whip out the keyboard and fix that!

Digression: Not like I’m a continuous ray of sunshine, but I put some thought into the ethics of posts which peer into the abyss during a time when everyone is jittery and half the populace is pissing itself. I try to limit consideration of things that cannot be solved. If it’s a done deal it’ll happen. Maybe at first it didn’t have to happen but when the choice is made, the Rubicon crossed, and the bridges burned, it’s best to stop looking in the rear view mirror. Better to write about butterflies.

Have y’all noticed I stopped bitching about the Federal Debt? It hit $10,000,000,000,000 sometime during Obamathon. I was like “huh, I guess it’s a done deal now”. Trumpski didn’t “fix it” because it was mathematically impossible to do so and probably he’s on board with debt anyway. (Only Rand Paul seems to care.) The Bidenverse has been spending like a monkey on crack. Now folks are shocked at the inevitable inflation that was inevitably inevitable. (Insert joke about Paul Krugman here.) I could post about it. But to what end?

In an amusing anecdote I had a $100 trillion Zimbabwe note… but I spent it.

Certain kinds of doom are neither our monkey nor our circus. So I try (and often fail) to focus on the light. Satirical squirrels and motorcycle dreams lead the way. And camping is the best light of them all!

Anyway, it was the donations that reminded me. I’d beaten the dead tree / ebook thing into the ground and was about to “peace out” when I realized “hey, lighten up dude”. It improved my attitude. BTW: I haven’t yet sent a thank you note but you know who you are and thank you very much!

If only to apologize for a camping thread that was all about literature and media delivery technology lets talk about my chuckbox.

A chuckbox is what campers use as a sort of “camp kitchen”. This is mostly car campers or possibly horse people. They’re too big for backpacking or whatnot. Most “chuckboxes” are filled with plates and pots and shit. Maybe a few spices or whatnot. I have all that but much more. I cram mine with all the normal stuff but also a stove, fuel, and enough food for a good long time. My idea was that (aside from water) I could grab the chuckbox and know for 100% sure I’d have enough for a few days. This is because I hate planning menus and shopping for grub. A “bug out chuckbox” suits me. I can say “fuck it” and blow town, knowing I’ll find something edible in there.

Lest you think it’s overkill (which it would be generally) most State / National Park campers are used to a grocery store or a McDonalds or something within a reasonable drive. I often (usually?) camp 50-100+ miles from the nearest open store; especially if it’s winter. That’s another good reason to cram a spare can of beans and a Mountain House in my chuckbox.

I use a Milwaukee Packout as my chuckbox. I love it! It’s tough as hell and stacks with other Packouts like Legos. It even looks cool. It’s probably not bear proof but they’d have to work hard to break it. I know it’s squirrel and bluejay proof. It’s waterproof and I wouldn’t hesitate to leave it out in the rain or snow.

If I ever join a cult, it’ll be based on Packouts.

As to details, the chuckbox is a Milwaukee Packout 22 inch Modular XL Tool Box. (I’d offer an Amazon link but for some reason Amazon sketchy about that one piece of Packout kit). It’s identical in size as the Packout Rolling Tool Box which I use for “tent stuff”.

(Note: Amazon requires I specifically mention that I get a kickback if you shop from any links I post. Which is true, so I heartily encourage you to follow a link and buy anything. If you buy something huge I’ll probably spend my little kickback on more camping stuff.)

Yes, the two components lock together tighter than two frogs fucking. I’m glad you asked.

I also use the Milwaukee 932471132 Packout Jobsite Cooler. It’s half the width of the chuckbox and locks down tight. It’s not the ultimate cooler but it’s a decent one. It’s a reasonable size for one guy. I can, if I wish, carry the cooler on my dirtbike too.

When I’m bringing my dirtbike for trail riding I bring a Milwaukee 15 in. PACKOUT Tool Bag. I put that on the other half of the chuckbox. It too locks down tight. I don’t use it for tools. I fill it with dirt bike things, a sweatshirt, maps, water bottles, gloves, etc… I ride solo and remote so I carry extra “survival” stuff on my bike. I’ve modified my dirtbike to accept half size Packouts. I can move the tool bag from the camping stack to the back of the bike in two seconds flat.

So if you imagine it, some bearded weirdo with a giant ridiculous Dodge shows up at camp. All these Packouts are bouncing around in the truck bed. He pulls out the wheeled thing and stacks the rest and they all lock together into a well planned out system. It’s heavy enough to kill a backpacker but perfect for a Dodge and he can effortlessly wheel it any reasonable “car camping” distance. You might think that guy has got his shit together.

The wheeled thing was originally the chuckbox, but the one without wheels has more internal room for stuff. And boy have I got a shitload of stuff in my chuckbox!

First thing’s first. Most people’s chuckbox doesn’t include the camp stove but mine does. See that plastic Folger’s can to the left? That’s an empty can that perfectly fits my Coleman Dual Fuel Stove. It’s such a perfect fit I swear the Folger’s people planned it. (It goes without saying that Folgers coffee sucks.)

Not only do I carry the stove in the chuckbox but I carry fuel. I bought a 20 ounce MSR liquid fuel bottle. It’s exactly the right size to fit upright but underneath the upper layer of trays! (Note: Someone is probably aiming to write about fuel stored inside a bottle, inside a tool box, which itself is tossed roughly in a truck bed. I don’t wanna’ hear it. My solution fits me and it’s not a rag stuffed into a wine bottle filled with gas. Nor am I interested in OSHA’s regulatory minutiae.)

Another note: when you’re fitting things together and getting them to work as a system, it’s worth it to pony up for the good stuff. Amazon is desperately trying to route me away from Packout boxes, Coleman liquid fueled stoves, and MSR brand bottles. Amazon is wrong! Get what works for you, not what Amazon decrees.

Some Packouts come with one tray that sits above the deep well where you keep your shit. There’s room for two. I scrounged up a second tray. It’s a slick arrangement. Little stuff like forks and soap and matches and skewers live in the trays and don’t get lost among the pots and pans below.

I probably have enough food to 5 days (or longer if desperate) in my chuckbox, but I cooked mostly fresh food. I’ll mention that in my next post. Stay tuned.