So, society is still punching itself in the balls; and today’s a bigger disaster than yesterday? Ho hum. I tune out because nobody sane likes to roll about in mass tantrums. Rather than address the endless shitstorm of 2020, about which y’all have already formed your own opinions, here’s a catch all of shit that amuses me.
A vampire castle? Count me in! I want it now!
If I was anywhere near able to even think about things in this price range, I’d be crawling all over it. Talk about prime real estate!
More in keeping with my price range, a reader sent me the photo below. I doubt it’s locally available but I’m prowling liquor stores just in case. Here’s the link. (Note: I have no financial ties to this company whatsoever.)
Another reader sent this. Clearly I’m not the only one who’s recognized the squirrel threat. (Here’s the link, no mention of Swedish Disco.)
Sea-Monkeys! Ace of Spades started this particular trip down memory lane. The video is somewhat amusing but it takes itself a little too seriously. I’m pretty sure no child, no matter how clueless, actually thought they’d buy some sort of alien species complete with their own civilization out of a comic book.
Good grief; nobody believed it! Or am I underestimating the immense depth of stupid that really exists? Can any mammal manage to walk upright and still be that gullible?
Nope. With all due respect, I call bullshit on “dissapointed kids”. As a young rascal, I sent away for seamonkeys, and I’m telling you, any kid who can address an envelope without putting an eye out know they weren’t like the ad copy. I got my order, raised up some brine shrimp, and was perfectly happy. It just never occurred to me that the ad copy was true. I mean how fuckin’ stupid can ya’ get?
Also the video could lay off the social analysis of a loon who sold weird shit in comic books. The ads were loony, the guy was loony, the shit he sold was weird. You expect depth of reason from such a source? It’s a comic book ad for nearly sentient alien creatures. Loons do shit like that and there’s no need to get your 2020s era panties in a bundle over it.
Also, it wasn’t a ripoff. I loved the little sea monkeys (or brine shrimp, or semi-sentient space aliens) that hatched. I don’t remember how long I had them but I remember it fondly and not with buyer’s remorse.
How Carob Traumatized a Generation. UGH! Carob was entirely disgusting and pretending it was chocolate is probably the dumbest thing anyone tried to do.
I hate the stuff! Once my mom made trail mix with dry dusty granola bits (not the yummy stuff they sell now but the grainlike crap hippies in the 1970’s inexplicably ingested). This was mixed with carob that was “just as good as chocolate but healthier”.
To top off that gastronomic disaster. I was given a can of Tab to wash it down. Is it any wonder I hate the 1970s?
There’s never been a more unnatural and disgusting mix than carob and Tab. Also, in what universe, was that kind of shit “health food”? Have you ever tasted Tab? It’s like sipping battery acid because cane sugar is unnatural. Which just adds to the disappointment of chewing down some dusty carob chips and what tasted like the floor sweepings in an oat mill. That taste is all you need to know. It’s simply obvious that you’re doing something wrong. Wrong I say! Folks might have fed that mess to me but I sure wouldn’t treat my innocent Sea-Monkeys like that! There ought to be limits! I’m just sayin’.
One last note: I dimly remembered that the TV ads had a serious hottie. Looks like that piece of solid gold marketing bullshit was planted solidly in my brain because… yowza!
Okay, here’s another one for you. My boss’s boss gave me a bottle of this a few years back. He said that it reminded him of me……..
https://foundersbrewing.com/our-beer/curmudgeon/
GMTA: we were just talking today at work about sea monkeys and X-ray specs. Haven’t had carob in forty years but remember it being ok when it was fed to me. Tab is just as disgusting as Mountain Dew. IMHO. Your tastes may vary. Diversity ‘n stuff, y’all.
Thank G_d I grew up in the country in a family of rednecks. We grew most of our own food and the little that we did buy, my parents never fell for any of those “health food” gimmicks. If we were going to spend our hard earned money on something like chocolate, it was going to be the real deal or nothing.
I was never exposed to most of these tortures while growing up in the ’70’s. Never had sea monkeys either…but I saw the ads in the comics and have to admit that I thought about it, even though I knew for sure it was BS. But heck, we had plenty of “pets”…most of which would eventually end up on the dinner table…but you still had to raise them.
Sailorcurt: I know this is silly, but… What does it say about me that your comment about sea monkeys made me think “What caliber for sea monkey?” It probably means too much tequila.
Talk of the current crap fest I remember back in 2016 you predicted Trump would win on the number of posters you saw supporting Hillary vs Trump. Have you noticed any similar phenomenon this year or are you, like many of us, completely pizzed off too much to look?
I have noticed a trend. I’ve been watching carefully. It’s more than I can put into a comment. I may make a post on this.
They are selling Draculas castle? Sigh! Fangs ain’t what they used to be, eh?
I’ve had several different wines that were aged in bourbon barrels. I will only mention the one that I found worthy: Cooper and Thief.
The rest were weak sisters.
If I find a bottle of the Curmudgeon, I’ll sample it and report back. With a name like that, it has a lot to live up to.
Kurt
Yeah, I ordered the “Sea Monkeys” too. I never had issues with “buyer’s remorse.” Hell; they arrived in a powederlike state, I added water, and they CAME TO LIFE! What wasn’t to love? Of course, these days, any picture of anything resembling a humanoid with the name “monkeys” attached would be considered RAAACIIIIS!T! E-GADS!
I’d almost forgotten about Tab. My mom drank the stuff, fooling herself into thinking it tasted like Coke. Yeah; right! I think my dad used it to clean the terminals on car batteries. That stuff was NASTY!
‘Never had the misfortune to sample carob, though I did ingest granola from time to time. Hell; it was the 60’s/early 70’s; “All natural…” Remember? Of course, so was cyanide…
Whatever doesn’t kill you will make you stronger. We survived. …So THERE, Millennials!
Nice castle. Plumbing won’t be a problem, as shit rolls downhill. There’s a well, so it has water.
An armory? Shit Yeah! And you can stock it with lots of surplus soviet weapons (great place for some nice 120mm mortars…) Just in time for Erdogan’s new Ottoman Empire to try to get frisky. So the access to lots of wooden poles would be handy.
Wonder if the current royal family is still handing out knighhoods for the Order of Dracul?
Needs a staff, though. I hear those eastern European ladies are hot! Maybe a butler or two. Get some nice german 4 wheel drive trucks like a Unimog or a Pinzegauer.