Basic Safety Lesson

[The purpose of this post is to convince you to watch the video at the bottom. Feel free to ignore me, scroll down, and watch. Watch the whole damn thing. It’s worth your time.]

When I was a young whippersnapper, society hoped to guide goofball kids like me toward role as self-reliant, moral, adult citizens. I humbly think it worked. That was long time ago in a galaxy far far away.

Society in 2020 selects against self-reliant, moral, adults. My mailbox is filled with census reminders. They urge me to fill out the form. Why? To apportion representatives and maintain the legitimate workings of a Republic? Nope! That’s thinking from a different time. I’m told the purpose of a census is to maximize the routing of Federal funds to my area. That’s bullshit and I worry about the thinking that generates such bullshit!

Imagine a society that trains its people to think of themselves as helpless! Less like self-reliant citizens and more like livestock on a vote farm.

What’s the endgame of that? Look out your window.

But I’m not writing to piss and moan about things. I’m here to discuss what you can personally do about it. This ‘aint about society, it’s about you. Assuming you’re a self-reliant, moral, adult you must protect your freedom and you must do it yourself. One thing you must manage is the overreach that gradually turns everyone into a criminal. When everyone is a criminal, the only thing that keeps you from punishment is the benevolence of your overlord. Who decides if you’re a criminal? Your overlord. The only thing that stands in the way are words on paper. When the words are respected, you can trust folks with authority. When the words aren’t respected, you can’t trust folks with authority. Among those who can’t trust; the police.

It’s a cliche, so forgive me. It’s also true. Life will throw risks at you and among those risks are mistreatment at the hands of Law Enforcement (or their supporting bureaucracies). The most dangerous form of oppression is not a roided up human tank in battle rattle “hut hut hut”ing about. It’s not MRAPs and body armor. The biggest risk is a snake in a suit.

Every interaction with every person even remotely connected to law enforcement is now (and maybe always has been) risky. Never trust them. A cop might seem very nice. He might be nice. Maybe he’s a hero that’ll save your bacon in times of terror. But he’s not the entire system. He (or she) works within a framework that can, will, and has, wrecked people who were innocent.

You’re never dealing with just one individual. You’re dealing with the system. A person can be moral, a system has no morals. You can meet a cop that’s sweeter than Andy Griffith, but if he hands his paperwork to Dolores Umbridge you’ve taken a huge risk.

Maybe this is the guy you meet. Great guy!

Maybe this is the one that’ll torture you mercilessly. Total bitch!

Lucky for us, life gives periodic warnings and lessons. This week had a great one.

I’m talking about Michael Flynn. I hesitate to mention Flynn. I don’t want people to get into a cycle of Orange Man Bad; if you hate Trump and everything that touches him… that’s not my business in this post. What I want to do is use Flynn as a reminder. He’s proof that nobody is safe when lawyers and law enforcement are unfettered. Flynn is simply a recent and concrete example of that effect. For contrast I also included hapless loser Richard Jewell… who wasn’t prosecuted but did get screwed over.

Again, I’m not trying to discuss politics. I neither want to celebrate “Flynn is off the hook , yay Merica!” or whine “CNN says he’s a bastard, prosecute him on grounds of being icky”. I just want to reflect on what can be learned from observation. I’ll draw with a broad brush and try to pick a few characters from all over the spectrum. This post is not about Flynn… it’s about you. Whether you’re rolling in patchouli or think Darth Vader was insufficiently authoritarian, the things I’m saying are basically things to keep in mind as you go about your day:

Fact: Innocents DO Get Harassed: Flynn’s case has been dropped by the Department of Justice. That’s as close to “clean bill of health” one can get. Once the case is dropped, Flynn is officially innocent. Furthermore, the things done to him, a man officially legally innocent, were painful and unjust. If you’re so blinded by hate for Trump that you just can’t live with Flynn as an innocent, fine. Try Richard Jewell as alternative example. There are many examples but those two ought to do for now.

Lesson: Victory Against False Prosecution Is Often Hollow. You don’t so much win a fight against immoral / illegal law enforcement as you survive. “Dropping the case” could be rephrased as “we’re going to temporarily stop punching you in the face for now.” Flynn just won a gangbusters victory; real David versus Goliath stuff. Yet there’s no ticker tape parade for Flynn. He may or may not get recompense for his expensive legal defense, the whole of the last three years was hell for the man, and his career was destroyed. There’s no real upside for Flynn. It’s like surviving leukemia, it’s nice to have lived but the whole process was terrifying and painful.

Lesson: There’s No Going Back: Flynn, like him or not, was injured and reduced. Consider his post as National Security Advisor. He worked a lifetime to get there but served only 21 days. He’s officially innocent. So is there a do-over for the innocent and mistreated? Nope. He will never regain the career he once had. Even if you’re found innocent, at some point you may not survive attack by lawyer and cop. Flynn was a well accomplished man and tough as nails. He barely held out. Richard Jewell fell into depression and eventually committed suicide.

Fact: Getting Harassed Is Not Limited To The Underclass: Flynn was not acting like a hooligan or thug. He had a job, brushed his teeth, and ate his vegetables. He doesn’t have a neck tattoo, sketchy investments, drug habits, or friends in seedy neighborhoods.

Lesson: You Can’t Live A Life So Pure That You’re Safe: Nobody has a lifestyle so tame and boring that abuse under the name of law will leave them alone. Flynn seems a bit of a stick in the mud. Richard Jewell is (or was) as threatening as a hamster.

Lesson: Some Behaviors May Help: Modesto Manifesto was a set of standards for religious leaders. Originally authored by Billy Graham it’s ridiculously strict; famously including never ever eating dinner alone with a woman who is not your wife. Vice President Pence adapted this practice (hence its nickname as the Pence Rule). Before we laugh at a grown man following uptight rules meant for pastors, observe that among the presidential and vice presidential candidates available in 2020, Pence uniquely hasn’t been accused of impropriety. Pence is boring as dirt but also immune to “honey trap” spycraft.

Heartwarming moment or a honey trap about to nail a dipshit Mountie to the wall? You decide.

Lesson: You Cannot Be Socially Powerful Enough To Be Safe: Flynn is a retired United States Army Lieutenant General. You know who’s not a retired Lieutenant General? You! The “social standing” pecking order puts you and I waaaaaaay down the list. Yet investigative overreach has affected not only Flynn but Trump. Yeah I said it. Here’s my money quote:

“If neither a respected lieutenant general nor a famous billionaire presidential candidate can protect themselves against prosecutorial misconduct, the rest of us are fucked.”

Lesson: Power Corrupts And Attracts The Corrupted: President Obama clearly hated Flynn. Trump hired Flynn on his campaign and later as National Security Advisor. There is no single human that could interact with both Trump and Obama in an honorable manner without annoying one or the other. In a properly managed lawful world that would be OK. In 2020 America, it’s unsafe. It’s my understanding that Flynn only started having troubles when Obama started not liking the guy. Even then he might have sailed safely into the sunset but he was framed, railroaded, and flung into a perjury trap because  he hired on with Trump.

Lesson: Obscurity Won’t Protect You: Sadly, the lesson here can’t be “avoid the powerful” because, as I mentioned before Richard Jewell was mistreated too. Perhaps the best lesson is, if you’re going to deal in 2020 at the Flynn level, someone will eventually go Game of Thrones on your ass (and the modern analogue to a knife in the ribs is a well funded lawyer that cheats). If you’re a nobody like Jewell, it’s just a reverse lottery win.

Fact: Exculpatory Evidence Gets Hidden: A prosecutor is supposed to reveal all exculpatory evidence. It’s not a suggestion, it’s the law. It’s necessary to protect the innocent. Flynn’s case finally fell apart when exculpatory evidence finally came out. It was  years late. They lied in court about the lack of exculpatory evidence. Brandon Van Grack, part of the DOJ team that pulled that shit, is no longer handling the case. He’s no longer handling any cases. Ideally, he’ll be disbarred and possibly do time. (I’m sure he’s a bit nervous right now.) Regardless, we have clear, obvious, evidence that the FBI didn’t follow the law. This wasn’t a mistake, it was a crime. I suspect, such things happen more than anyone wants to admit. Scout the news and you’ll find hints of hidden exculpatory evidence; key moments when body cams are off, security footage of a prison hallway disappears for a crucial moment, missing brass at Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, every single FBI interview is done without a tape recorder, etc… Patterns of sketchy behavior have been coming out in dribs and drabs but the amount seems to be on the rise. Besides, the FBI has been involved in shady crap since they were hassling Martin Luther King Jr. There’s no reason to think the FBI (or any organization) is honorable.

Fact: Perjury Traps Happen: The Flynn case shows the FBI specifically set out to coax Flynn into lying so they could spring what’s called a perjury trap. Anything you say to a law enforcement officer can be used to spring such a trap. Suppose you’re asked “is the sky blue” and you say yes. Suppose later, in court you think “gosh, it was kinda’ cloudy that day”. Bam! That’s the basic setup. You baited the trap when you talked to them in the first place. The proper answer to “is the sky blue” is “I want my lawyer”. Before you think Flynn was a fool to fall for such a rinky-dink tactic, it’s lying under oath that got Former President Clinton impeached. Everyone seems to associate it with sexual behavior but it’s  not illegal get a hummer. Clinton talked when “Fuck off and I want my lawyer” would’ve led to a different fate.

Fact: You Need A Lawyer: Before meeting with the FBI, Flynn asked “do I need my lawyer”. The FBI said “nah”. Three years later an unemployed and broke man was just found innocent. Never speak to a snake without your own snake present.

THE BIG FAT HONKING LESSON OF BOTH RICHARD JEWELL AND MICHAEL FLYNN:

Never talk to the cops.

A SECOND LESSON FROM THE CURMUDGEON:

Once each year, watch this 40 minute video. Don’t watch it once and forget. You’re not smarter or more powerful than Flynn, or Trump, or Clinton. You might be smarter than Jewell but that’s no excuse… you should add watching this video to whatever Pence Rule behavior you adapt. “Once per year I’ll watch the funny video about not talking to cops.” Don’t forget. Tattoo it on your ass. Watch it every year until YouTube censors it. If you watched it last year, watch it again this year. Never skip a year. There may come a time when you’re glad you did.

Remember, even if you’re paranoid, they might really be out to get you.