phe·nol·o·gy
noun /fiˈnäləjē/
1.The study of cyclic and seasonal natural phenomena, esp. in relation to climate and plant and animal life
There are several pieces of evidence which indicate impending seasonal shift.
First: I saw a motorcycle on the road. It was a beefed up Harley with giant ape hangers. (Could there be a worse ergonomic for handlebars than apehangers?) The fellow riding it seemed to have no particular cold-weather gear. When I ride in the cold I wear heavy jacket, a full face helmet, gauntlet gloves (from a snowmobile company) and if I’m really smart, my homemade electric vest. He was dressed like it was a 50 degree summer evening. It was 31° and dropping rapidly because the sun had just set.
I don’t know how far the fellow was going (he was just puttering along in town) but I have a theory that highway speeds on an exposed face at 31° is somewhere between painful and ludicrous. Frostbite in ten minutes maybe? Fifteen? Thus, I conclude that he was not going far or if he did he is now in the emergency room getting a face transplant.
Ironically at the exact same time I glanced at the nearby lake and there was a car on the ice. I couldn’t see clearly but it looked like a generic sedan; possibly an Impala. It was parked on a cleared part of the ice that had been an ice skater’s racing loop. I can only assume that some idiot was going to try his luck on the loop? I was in a hurry so I couldn’t stop to see if he sunk or wrecked… though either seemed reasonable.
Anytime you see a guy without a face mask riding a motorcycle in 31° while someone else is driving on an ice-skating loop on a lake… you are in the presence of world class cabin fever. Change is afoot!
Second: There is a broken down snowmobile stranded on the grass in the ditch about a mile from my house.
Third: The damn cats killed another one of the rabbits. This wasn’t a “gently receding ice discovery”. It was a “disemboweled woodland mammal on the driveway” discovery. I don’t know if this is related or not but two of the cats decided it was a good time to beat the hell out of each other. They were going at it with hammer and tongs in a big muddy quagmire that thaws every sunny day and freezes every night. During the warmest part of the afternoon the two cats decided to go at it and they were taking no prisoners. Both of them got coated in meltwater and mud from head to tail.
They must be evenly matched because neither one was bleeding. In fact, both of them looked like they’d been hit by a dump truck. There were no winners in that fight.
Since one of them had offed probably the sole remnant of my fall rabbit hunting stock twelve hours previously I call for a pox on both their houses. I was not sympathetic to their plight and if I find a muddy cat-sicle in the driveway it serves them right. They can be buried at sea in the hole where the Impala goes.
That is all. Observationally yours, AC.
AC: Wait, you have TWO cats?
I used to commute year ’round on a Yamaha. That Dude was merely expressing his Brand Loyalty. Or he’s stupid. Or poor and that is his only ride. My money is on “stupid”. And I was commuting in California; I may be one of Hill’s “despicables” but I ain’t terminally stupid.
In this climate it wasn’t his daily driver. I also commuted 12 months a year in my past, but certainly not here. I’m thinking that the poor guy was just dying for the first ride of the year.
Right now there are two. I usually keep a few of the evil little jackasses on hand lest the mice overrun the homestead.
Two is one…
Ha ha ha… with these two assholes I’d be perfectly happy if an owl nabs one. Time for a new farm kitten anyway.
ETA: I have never, ever, driven onto the ice in any four-wheeled vehicle that I owned on which I place any value.
I drove my older truck on a huge lake once. When I was 6 miles out I just couldn’t get over how weird it felt. Spent the night there ice fishing… which is really like sensory deprivation with beer. Not a bad way to kill a weekend.
Maybe if I borrowed a truck…
When the US Army wanted to play Arctic War with a buncha gear on the ice, they would drill a hole and put a ruler (the measuring kind, not Trump) in it with a low-rank to watch the water level. He would sound the alarum if the stick started to submerge. High-tech.
I still don’t understand how this links to Terry, Mary, Doogie, Billy, and Bart…
And Boo. Or has Kandi forced him to eat “fish”???
}:-]
There will be fish but not that kind! Boo is busy with his linguistic studies.
Does a Chevrolet Impala count as a truck? Or is it in the “lightweight” category as a harbinger of spring?
Anything bigger than an ATV is good enough to satisfy the weather Gods. I’ve got all this stuff figured out. 🙂
I think I saw a herd of Chevy Impalas on a nature show about African wildlife. They’re endangered y’know- something about gas mileage or pollution controls.
They’re no good for eating.
Oooh, good one!