Attack Of The Lesbian Activist Squirrels!
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Category Archives: Sagas
Billy stood before the big glass doors and smiled. It was an all-night convenience store. It was devoid of customers, except Billy. It was all for him! He took a step forward and the doors opened noiselessly. Merely a matter … Continue reading
Achmed Hussein Muhammad adjusted his cheap polyester uniform and took a deep breath. He needed this. Grievance Studies was a surprisingly difficult major. There was just so much bullshit to learn. Every “fact” was contradicted by some other “fact” and … Continue reading
In case you were afraid I’d started taking life seriously (as if!), put that concern out of your head right now. I hereby declare this week will be exclusively squirrels. The next several posts will explore the Church of Awesome, … Continue reading
Boo’s life improved immeasurably with the arrival of the TV remote. Not because it controlled a TV so much as it controlled a human. Boo decided what he wanted Kandi to do and issued instructions through electronics tied to the … Continue reading
Kandi and four friends were jumping up and down screeching at the screen. They made high pitched whines, lower grunts, and mid-range shouts. Their sounds didn’t resolve into words or sentences. They jumped a lot. Boo watched from his vantage … Continue reading
Kandi wasn’t looking great when morning came. She’d been drunk long before she dropped the bottle and Boo initiated his plan. Thus, she’d gone further into Planet Alcohol than usual. She was wandering around in dirty pink fuzzy slippers. Her … Continue reading
At 12:06 am, Kandi, an unemployable anthropology major with little brain and less desire to use it, dropped a nearly finished plastic bottle of Captain Morgan. Boo, her dog, bucking generations of genetic conditioning for loyalty, surreptitiously made off with … Continue reading
This video was captured in a living room in Portland. Squirrels were involved. All will be explained in due time.
Upstairs in his apartment Janice was writing in her journal: 09:45 Buy a new cat. Ali the cat was perched out of reach on top of the refrigerator. He beamed with joy. He stretched and flexed his claws. Then he … Continue reading