After Careful Consideration They’ve Decided To Have Their Cake And Eat It Too

“When you get to a fork in the road, take it.”

Yogi Berra's decision making showed more wisdom than our current crop of Congressweasels.

Never underestimate a politician’s ability to ignore the obvious. We’ve got an overwhelming soul crushing debit hanging over our head like the sword of Damocles and both sides have decided to fund their favorite bullshit initiatives. Congress regardless of a tectonic shift in the party in power has continued to ignore their obligations and decided instead to play Santa Claus. I’ve got news for them, the Santa Claus gig is filled and they weren’t elected to give out candy. Get to work making realistic choices damn it!

A visual demonstration of debt.

Democrats want everything under the sun and a free pony. This includes extending unemployment benefits for another 13 months. As a Curmudgeon I must ask; which magic leprechaun gave you the money to pay for it and how many extensions does one add to benefits until there’s just no point in working? “Working for a living” is already dangerously close to a quaint outdated concept bloggers put in quotes. Of course I’ve long known that Democrats live in a relativistic haze where results don’t matter so long as you mean well. Thus I’m not surprised.

Republicans want deficit reduction… Bwa ha ha ha!!! Oh man I crack myself up! Republicans only want deficit reduction when there’s a Democrat in the White House. And they only want deficit reduction if we can fight two ground wars simultaneously. And only if the tax rates stay low. And only if we continue fully funding medical programs, social security, a strong military, and bailouts for banks. So, when tax rates might have gone up and slightly reduced the degree to which our nation runs in the red they stuck their head in the sand and said “no new taxes”…a lot like the most recent one term president who sired the most recent Republican deficit generation machine. Of course, I’ve long known that Republicans expect magic fairies to pay for the Baby Boomer’s unfunded retirement. Thus I’m not surprised.

Given that the electorate wants everything and the electorate can’t have everything what did Congress choose? After careful deliberation they decided to give everyone everything. Everyone is a winner and all must have prizes. Those no talent ass clowns couldn’t run a lemonade stand without mortgaging a city block.

The “budget compromise” where each party gets shiny toys and the deficit grows demonstrates that denial will continue until we have a real crash. There is no way in hell they’ll avert disaster. In the mid 1970’s I understood that the shit was going to hit the fan when Baby Boomers retired. It wasn’t rocket science. I understood the nature of a ponzi scheme just like I understood that the road runner would kick the coyote’s ass every time. Alas I was so naïve that I thought a disaster foretold was a disaster which could be averted. Forty years later everyone…even hamsters and houseplants…knows kicking the can down the road is unsustainable. Yet Congress will fix the septic tank only when there’s shit floating around their ankles. Time’s up!

Open note to congress; you gutless sons of bitches need to grow a pair of balls and learn to choose among those things you can afford. You chickenshit pussies haven’t shown the restraint of a child with a dollar in his hand staring at an aisle of candy bars. Pick one thing, pay cash, and shut up.

Open note to the American people; you gutless sons of bitches need to grow a pair of balls and learn to choose among those things you can afford. If you can’t afford it, don’t ask the government to provide it. Suck it up and live within your means.

Oh yeah, Merry Christmas everyone.

(Note: Sword of Damocles sourced here. It’s an excellent painting I’m pleased to add as a counterpoint to Yogi’s mug. Let it never be said that I’m an obnoxious asshole who lacks culture.)

About AdaptiveCurmudgeon

Adaptive Curmudgeon is handsome, brave, and wise.
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