My Award For Crack Investigative Journalism

On December 28th, 2010 various whistleblowers blew the “cover” on a covert Federal government activity.  Variously known as Project Gunrunner, Project Gunwalker, and Operation Fast and Furious they don’t make anyone look good.  The full scope of these activities has been percolating through the mishmash of stonewalling, delay tactics, and inevitable disgusting revelations of a generic ugly scandal.  Percolating very slowly.

A scandal?  What’s new?  I suppose water is wet too?  But this isn’t just any scandal.  This one in particular is interesting.  It involves guns, criminals in foreign countries, and a dead Border Patrol guard.  Scandals about Enron stock and blowjobs are one thing.  Facilitating dead bleeding cops on American soil at the hands of foreign criminals is a whole different level of wrong.

Also (and I know it’s cynical but I’ll cop to it) I wanted to know what would happen in the presses’ co-dependent relationship with Obama.  Here is a scandal that left an honest lawman dead on the ground.  It’s pretty hard to ignore a bloody corpse.  Yet we have a president whom was installed by a press that practically worshiped his campaign in 2008.  How would this compare to Nixon’s Watergate or Regan’s Iran Contra Affair?  Nixon was an asshole and Regan was a conservative; would a modern day Woodward and Bernstein investigate a charming, black, liberal, president?  Or would this unfortunate (but true) failure wallow around the internet among flat earthers and moon landing conspiracy nuts?

Furthermore, it is my experience that presidents fall victim to their hubris in their second term.  You can set your clock by it.  My pet theory is that most administrations simply can’t keep their house in order for a full eight years and so most get the scandal they sowed.  The rest are torn down when their political enemies simply can’t be quieted once they’re a lame duck.  Thus a scandal is manufactured for those few that didn’t thoughtfully provide their own.  It’s not a particularity charitable theory, but I’m sticking with it.

So you’ve got a conundrum, a genuine “dead cop and smoking gun” tragedy that’s too absurd for any sane press to ignore.  Yet you’ve got an administration that in 2008 could probably have strangled a kitten on stage and they’d have spun it in his favor.  Also it’s too soon for the usual lame duck feeding frenzy.  How long would the press bury it?

In short, I wanted to quantify the lag time between “public knowledge for freaks like me that pay attention” and “public knowledge for the terminally uninformed” (regardless of whether it’s low brow Wal-Mart cluelessness or Ivy League self delusion).

The story broke in December 2010.  I, having no particular interest or news gathering ability, have been aware of it since early 2011.  You don’t have to be a genius to find such information on the internet (and winnow the likely truths for the crackpot stuff).  A trickle of news stories came out over the spring and summer of 2011.  But it certainly hadn’t made it to coffee shop level of discourse.

All this time, I’ve never mentioned it in “polite company”.  I’d sound like a batshit nuts paranoid fruitcake if I just happened to, say at a dinner party, blurt out “The BATFE allowed guns to go to Mexican cartels who used them to kill innocent people!”  Not because it’s false.  It isn’t.  It just plain sounds too crazy to be true.

This is something that annoys me.  Lots of things that are actually, verifiably, undoubtedly true sound crazy anyway.  Until folks stir themselves to learn the true thing I’m easily dismissed as a kook.  (I certainly look like one.)  And it’s always easier to dismiss a kook than deal with the uncomfortable possibility that the world is pretty damn weird.   Which is why I try very hard to discuss only weather and deer hunting in most social settings.

So why am I mentioning all this today?  Because today (November 8th 2011) is the day!  National Public Radio made a brief oblique reference to “Operation Fast and Furious”.  It was short and made very little mention of anything damning.  Almost like it’s routine for the Attorney General (Eric Holder) to testify before Congress that he doesn’t know about deliberately facilitated international arms smuggling.   It was shorter and came after reports about allegations that a pre-nomination Republican presidential candidate (Herman Cain) was accused of sexual harassment two decades ago.  Got that?  The sitting Attorney General’s testifying to congress about Federal gun smuggling is lower priority than a candidate/talk show host’s 20 year old legal settlement.  Really?

For bravely delaying slightly less than one full year I award NPR this year's "Golden Pravda". My personal award for journalistic obfuscation.

Therefore I declare that it takes eleven months and eight days for a whistleblower’s call to become something that even National Public Radio can’t ignore.

A.C.

P.S.  In case you recently came out of a coma (or depend on NPR for news) I’ll give a very crude overview of the scandal du jour.  Apparently a complex of Federal agencies intentionally and successfully managed to allow weapons to be smuggled from American soil into a Mexican drug cartel’s hands.   Hmm…bad guys with guns.  It plays out exactly as expected.  On December 14th, 2010 US Border Patrol Agent Brian Terry was killed in a shootout in Arizona with a weapon the BATFE knowingly allowed to be smuggled into Mexico.  Lesson?  Given enough power and sufficient hubris it is possible to scramble your brain until utterly insane actions like giving guns to Mexican crime syndicates sounds like a nifty idea.  Humility and politics are enemies, which is why these sorts of cockamamie ideas gain flight.

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Dance Break

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Bread Is Not Oak

Homemade bread stored in the freezer is as solid as a block of wood.

But this is not a permanent state.

It took me a minutes to come to my senses and wait for it to thaw.  All you fellows out there can learn from my impatience; put down the chainsaw and chill out.  There are worse fates than waiting a half hour before you can make toast.

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Math Is Hard

Coyote Blog presents us with this: Continue reading

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The World’s Most Predictable Milestone; Passed

  1. If you have a pulse you know Social Security is a Ponzi sheme.  (If you don’t have a pulse but you’re still reading blogs…apparently you’re dead and my blog is a hellish eternal torment.  Sorry about that.  Hope you had fun on Halloween.)
  2. Everyone knows that Ponzi schemes are inherently doomed.  (They’re also illegal.)
  3. Everyone younger than a certain age knows Social Security won’t be there for them.  If you didn’t know that, read and memorize the last sentence.  Act accordingly.  You’ve been warned.

    David Spade is 47 years old. He is old enough to know that there will be no (or very little) Social Security left for him. If you're about 47 and are counting on Social Security you're dumber than Joe Dirt. You don't want to be dumber than Joe Dirt!

  4. Thus Social Security is the rare sort of train wreck that is known decades in advance and it happens anyway.

But I am remiss.  I failed to monument the year 2010 as the time when the end game began.  Not that it matters.  It was a done deal years ago.  Many years of rudderless navel gazing procrastination made it mathematically unavoidable.

However, for the record, the year was 2010.  I refer you to the Washington Post:

Last year, as a debate over the runaway national debt gathered steam in Washington, Social Security passed a treacherous milestone. It went ‘cash negative.‘”

Note: The Washington Post requires a free login.  You don’t have to bother.  (I didn’t.) I’m merely using the link to officially mark the occasion.

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The Bill Of NO Rights

I present a link to the excellent Bill Of NO Rights.  Rather than wantonly cut and paste I’ll provide the preamble and first article. Click through to read the rest (it’s worth it):

The Bill Of NO Rights

We, the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid any more riots, keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior and secure the blessings of debt-free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great grandchildren, hereby try one more time to ordain and establish some common sense guidelines for the terminally whiny, guilt-ridden, delusional and other liberal, commie, pinko bedwetters.

We hold these truths to be self-evident: that a whole lot of people were confused by the Bill of Rights and are so dim that they require a Bill of No Rights.

ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen color TV or any other form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is guaranteeing anything.

Hat tip to Borepatch who pointed me to Red Hill Kudzu who says he got the Bill Of No Rights from Backwoods Home.  

Continue reading

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A Bad Day At Work

I had one of those days at work. I swear it was just like the video. Except my car sucks, Patrick McGoohan has better hair, I wasn’t gassed by a guy in a top hat, the evil bubble of doom was a meeting, and I still have to shovel chicken shit tonight.

Other than that…it was exactly the same.

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The Duel

Hat tip to Uncle Jay.  Click there at once.

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A Post About Nothing

I just split a trailer load of wood and then took a break to eat a half a jar of dill pickles.  Both were pretty satisfying.  I have no idea why.

No…there is no point to this post.

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Win Win Chicken Trade

The trust fund yoyos “occupying” Wall Street remind me of the common but inexcusable notion that person A’s poverty is caused by person B’s wealth.  The assumption that someone who’s rich got that way by oppressing others and if someone who’s poor got that way by being shafted by rich bastards is just plain wrong.  Worse yet, it’s a dismal self defeating world view that ignores the most logical economic interaction of all; the one where both parties are pleased with the outcome.  I do not live in a world where every trade creates a loser.  There is no reason to suspect that all interactions screw someone.  Anyone who does is either projecting or needs to start making better decisions.  Life is not a zero sum game.

But you all know that.  So I’m going to talk about a mutually beneficial trade that just happened on our homestead.  Old chickens.

Hens, like people, start out life cute and useless.  (Little baby chicks are the cutest damn thing ever and even a Neanderthal like me will say “awwww” watching them.)  Like people they progress through a period of adolescent non-productivity where they consume tons of food and shit on everything.  Only after several months are they mature enough to lay eggs.  Mother nature gives homesteaders this lesson in delayed gratification every time a fuzzy little chick peeps into the world.

Once you’ve raised hens to that magic age they’re incredibly productive.  But nothing lasts forever and they slow down with time.  They’ll live several more years and they’re still excellent mobile bug zappers and yard ornaments.  It might make sense to keep them around as pets, but they won’t lay enough eggs to sell.

I sell eggs.  I’ve got to get new hens on-line and take the old hens off line.  Off line in this context means butchered and in the freezer.  The old hens are eating too much feed and occupying my limited barn space. I can’t feed the old and the young through the winter.

On the one hand this is pretty cool.  Our low productivity chickens can be a source of food.  If we were on the set of The Road we’d be pretty darned pleased.  More than one family has overwintered on chicken soup.  The economy cranks a few points one way or the other and I might find myself delighted with a month of chicken dishes.

On the other hand, butchering is hard work and old egg laying hens are scrawny.  They’re not like young meat birds which are plump and easier to process.  They’re like wild game.  A lot of work to make a meal.  Ma and Pa Ingalls had time to mess around with such things.  I’ve got a day job so I don’t.  Plus I can buy food.  In the battle between meat from old egg layers and my limited time…I’d rather not deal with it.

So they’re an asset but I’m too lazy to harvest it (or rather I’m blessed with superior options).  What to do?  Meanwhile they’re laying eggs every day.  Someone who just wanted some eggs for themselves would be happy with them.  Delighted, in fact.

Fortunately we met some folks who need what we’ve got.  They’d had some predator issues with their chickens and needed replacements.  They want just a few eggs for their household.  Win-win.

We gave them all they wanted.  It didn’t cost them a dime.  I don’t have to butcher them.  Which frees my time to drink coffee and write pointless blogs.

If you were to ask the Occupy Wall Street folks they’d have to construe it that someone got screwed.  But we both came out happy.  How cool is that?

A.C.

Update: I suspect some of my readers with a more economics/scientific bent will point out this isn’t really a trade since I didn’t get anything but relief from the butchering job.  They might point out that the only reason I felt an obligation to butcher the chickens is ethics.  (I could just kill them all and toss them in a compost pile.)  Strictly speaking they’re correct but just killing several score critters is something I’d like to avoid.  My reticence wouldn’t show up in a formula and misunderstanding that is why economists don’t get invited to really good parties.

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