Attack Of The Lesbian Activist Squirrels!
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Category Archives: Lesbian Squirrels
Road To Portland: Part 8: Peering Through The Fog
The Analyst was having a bad day. He was out of Mountain Dew, the transmission on his SUV had crapped out, and the data… The data was completely vexing. “You seem nervous.” It was the Cigarette Smoking man, who is … Continue reading
Road To Portland: Part 7: Billy Takes A Walk On The Wild Side
How would you know you’d hit rock bottom? This weighed upon Billy’s mind as he drove. He concluded one sign was grasping at straws. Delivering 10 pizzas to the middle of nowhere was grasping at straws. He wanted the money; … Continue reading
Road To Portland: Part 6: Carpe-ing The Diem
Billy was itching to deliver a pizza. You can’t make money just standing around. The phone rang and an order went up on the screen. Two small vegetarian pizzas for a few blocks away. Billy recognized the address. It was … Continue reading
Road To Portland: Part 5: Ayn Rand’s Disciple Takes A Punch
“Billy Loser” wasn’t Billy’s name but he temporarily matched the nickname. He was a pizza delivery boy and Uber driver. He’d recently dropped out of college, his Subaru needed new brake pads, his girlfriend had dumped him, and he hadn’t … Continue reading
Road To Portland: Part 4: A Quest Is Initiated
Bart was going to die. He’d spent autumn, when he should’ve been gorging on the bounty of nature (or stolen apples), petrified and covered with skunk bits. Without a store of fat, hibernation was just another word for starvation. Even … Continue reading
Road To Portland: Part 3: Winter Is Coming
Seven thousand feet above a nondescript homestead in the middle of nowhere a beautiful thing was happening. A minute particle of dust became the nucleus for a gossamer structure of ice crystals. This crystalline entity, almost achingly beautiful on its … Continue reading
Road To Portland: Part 2: The Failure Of Operation Deplorable
A thousand miles away the Analyst was watching a series of monitors. Drones were circling so high above the Curmudgeon’s forest that they might as well be satellites. Satellites were peering so intensely at the area they might as well … Continue reading
Road To Portland: Part 1: In Which A Financially Unsound Decision Is Made
The Curmudgeon had a choice to make. He stared at the crater and weighed his options. All of the squirrels were missing, an oak had exploded, and a bear was petrified. It was the government’s fault! Those bastards! He knew … Continue reading
Lesbian Squirrels: Part 12: Birth Of The DudeBro
Dr. Simone Moonglow Lenin Rothschild’s plans were working! She had the five nitwits lined up in uncomfortable wooden chairs facing a screen in a darkened room. “Is this part of the ‘Disco-cracy, Abba, And Transspecies Raptors’ seminar?” Asked one. “Will … Continue reading
Lesbian Squirrels: Part 11: Like You Didn’t See This Coming
On August 21, 1957 Russia completed its first successful test of the R-7 launch vehicle new. The ICBM was born. On July 9, 1959 the United States declared that it’s version of the ICBM, an armed Atlas A rocket, was … Continue reading