Category Archives: Chapter 3 – Road To Portland

Upstairs in his apartment Janice was writing in her journal: 09:45 Buy a new cat. Ali the cat was perched out of reach on top of the refrigerator. He beamed with joy. He stretched and flexed his claws. Then he … Continue reading →

“That’s the third blender this week!” Cop #1 was keeping a list of things the unhinged Janice hurled from his apartment. “Broken window, shit flying out of it. That’s probable cause enough to knock on the door.” Said cop #2. … Continue reading →

Resting in the passenger seat of the Subaru, Doogie was grinding his teeth while reading half of a newspaper. Billy had the other half and was grunting angrily at his section. The squirrels were asleep on the dash. The bear … Continue reading →

Across the street from Janice’s second floor apartment, two men in a sedan were observing. “Did you see the phone?” “I know. Who has a landline?” “Who throws one through the window?” “Yeah, there’s that.” “Good distance though. Dude could … Continue reading →

Tyson, a high-strung cat, was having a bad day. Ali, a cat who never gave a shit about anything, was doing fine. Tyson was reacting to Janice, who owned both of them (presuming anyone truly owns a cat). Tyson was … Continue reading →

The phone rang. Startled, Janice jumped. She began to tear up again but the steroids won over and he gritted his teeth. By the second ring, he was in a seething, white hot, murderous rage. Before the third ring could … Continue reading →

Janice’s recent history had been beyond his control. He’d expected to get a hard time from his pals at the gym, from fight organizers, from everyone… Instead the world rolled out the red carpet. Frankly he’d been disappointed. He’d been … Continue reading →

It is common to think you’ll recognize the best day of your life. Quite the opposite is true. Inflection points that alter bad trajectories and mitigate accumulated loss often pass beneath one’s awareness. In the case of Janice, he (or … Continue reading →

“There’s only one errand left and then we’re outta’ here.” Doogie announced to everyone’s relief. “Billy.” Doogie beamed. “You must commit a small crime which is the alibi for the larger one we are living. Ideally, you’ll get caught for … Continue reading →

The “paperwork”, much of it sporting enticing digits preceded by a dollar sign, led Doogie to start a cottage industry in funds transfers, deposits via snail mail, and other nefarious activities… all with the squirrel’s delighted approval. Doogie planned and … Continue reading →