Author Archives: AdaptiveCurmudgeon

About AdaptiveCurmudgeon

Adaptive Curmudgeon is handsome, brave, and wise.

Grandma Bread

Posted on January 12, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

Getting cooking advice from me is ironic. I do not cook…I kill stuff, eat things, and manufacture food. Cooking is, to me, a means to an end; the “end” of course is not starving (and avoiding the ingestion of shit). Continue reading →

Posted in Homesteading | Leave a comment

I Can’t Wait For The Future

Posted on January 11, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

The future is gonna’ be awesome! Predictions for the year 2111 in The Astonishing World Of The Future describe amazing advances in technology. Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Grandma Test Win!

Posted on January 10, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

Strike back against the high fructose monosodium enhanced concentrated wombat shit we are trained to unthinkingly shovel into our gaping American maws. Real food is delicious, healthy, cheap, and kicks ass. Continue reading →

Posted in Homesteading, Libertarian Outpost | Leave a comment

Word For The Day: Grandma Test

Posted on January 9, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

Grandma Test – noun: The evaluation of prepared food before it is eaten in the light of what someone’s grandma in 1880 would think of it. Continue reading →

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Tractor Of The Damned: Part IX (A New Dawn After Dipstick’s Mistake)

Posted on January 6, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

It is possible that I had this coming. It is possible that we all live many lives. It is possible that in my last life I was really really bad. Possibly a cackling maniac who carjacked nuns, stole candy from babies, and invested stranger’s money in Enron stock. This could be the reason why every machinist, mechanic, or Dipstick who’d gone near the tractor had done worse than wrong but practically sabotaged it. Continue reading →

Posted in Garagineering, Tractor Of The Damned | 11 Comments

Tractor Of The Damned: Part VIII (Dipstick Is Saved By Chickadees)

Posted on January 5, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

I set down the vice grip and we rolled the tractor out of the garage. Outside the sun was shining and my beloved chickadees were calling. The smoke was already dissipating. God wants us to forgive. I like chickadees. Continue reading →

Posted in Garagineering, Tractor Of The Damned | 9 Comments

Tractor Of The Damned: Part VII (Dipstick’s Diagnosis)

Posted on January 4, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

So long as a beer was in one hand and a cigarette in the other, Dipstick seemed confident.  For about an hour he orbited the tractor while I offered wrenches or turned the hand crank.  (It has a “backup” hand … Continue reading →

Posted in Garagineering, Tractor Of The Damned | 10 Comments

Tractor Of The Damned: Part VI (Meet Mr. Dipstick)

Posted on January 3, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

After a few calls I’d arranged for the fellow to come look at my tractor. I’ve since forgotten his name. Probably because of the trauma. For now I’ll call him Dipstick. Continue reading →

Posted in Garagineering, Tractor Of The Damned | 8 Comments

Tractor Of The Damned: Part V (With A Labor Rant)

Posted on January 2, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

After my fiasco trying to pull start an inert lump of metal cleverly disguised as a tractor I came to several important conclusions. #1:  I just wasn’t smart enough to figure out what was hosed and un-hose it. Someone else, … Continue reading →

Posted in Garagineering, Tractor Of The Damned | 11 Comments

Tractor Of The Damned: Part IV

Posted on January 1, 2012 by AdaptiveCurmudgeon

If something isn’t working. And you’re pissed off. And you’re the kind of fellow that has a big chain and a truck… You might be thinking that the chain and truck will solve your problems. This is an excellent time to sip a nice cup of tea and then go to bed. Continue reading →

Posted in Garagineering, Tractor Of The Damned | 6 Comments