Author Archives: AdaptiveCurmudgeon

Upstairs in his apartment Janice was writing in her journal: 09:45 Buy a new cat. Ali the cat was perched out of reach on top of the refrigerator. He beamed with joy. He stretched and flexed his claws. Then he … Continue reading →

“That’s the third blender this week!” Cop #1 was keeping a list of things the unhinged Janice hurled from his apartment. “Broken window, shit flying out of it. That’s probable cause enough to knock on the door.” Said cop #2. … Continue reading →

Resting in the passenger seat of the Subaru, Doogie was grinding his teeth while reading half of a newspaper. Billy had the other half and was grunting angrily at his section. The squirrels were asleep on the dash. The bear … Continue reading →

Across the street from Janice’s second floor apartment, two men in a sedan were observing. “Did you see the phone?” “I know. Who has a landline?” “Who throws one through the window?” “Yeah, there’s that.” “Good distance though. Dude could … Continue reading →

Tyson, a high-strung cat, was having a bad day. Ali, a cat who never gave a shit about anything, was doing fine. Tyson was reacting to Janice, who owned both of them (presuming anyone truly owns a cat). Tyson was … Continue reading →

The phone rang. Startled, Janice jumped. She began to tear up again but the steroids won over and he gritted his teeth. By the second ring, he was in a seething, white hot, murderous rage. Before the third ring could … Continue reading →

Janice’s recent history had been beyond his control. He’d expected to get a hard time from his pals at the gym, from fight organizers, from everyone… Instead the world rolled out the red carpet. Frankly he’d been disappointed. He’d been … Continue reading →