Mrs. Curmudgeon, who’s infinitely patient, has had to sit through countless movies while I demonstrate absolutely no knowledge of what’s going on. There’s a deeply nuanced environment and I just show up in the middle like some sort of tourist. I blame movies that involve men in tights. I ask dumb questions:
Me: “Where’s Batman?”
Mrs. Curmudgeon: “This is Guardians of the Galaxy!”
Me: “The one with the tree? I love the tree!”
Mrs. Curmudgeon: “Yes, the tree. Be like Groot and say few words.”
Me: “Got it! I can grok Groot. But it looks like the bad guys are gaining the upper hand, do you think Gandalf is going to show up?”
Mrs. Curmudgeon: “You mean Dr. Strange, and no… not gonna happen.”
Me: “Oh well, at least there’s an awesome cameo. Look it’s Hugh Hefner!”
Mrs. Curmudgeon: “That’s Stan Lee! This is the Marvel Cinematic Multiverse. You’re a Neanderthal wandering lost in the Louvre.”
Me: “Yeah, whatever, so when’s Batman coming?”
Mrs. Curmudgeon: “That’s DC. This is Marvel!” She pauses. “You’re about to ask about Dumbledore aren’t you?”
Me: “Snape’s a badass.”
Mrs. Curmudgeon: “Ugh, this is like when you were in that gun shop pretending you couldn’t tell the difference between a revolver and a pistol. How much of you is dumb and how much is just an ass?”
Me: “Honestly, I have no idea. I’m just a tourist in this movie.”
This means I’m totally on board with folks who have no idea what I mean by The Attack Of The Lesbian Squirrels. Everyone’s welcome to join. Long time readers already know the secret of Abba but new readers will figure it out soon enough. However, anyone who wants to start at page one should head over to their page.
Now for some editorial information that might interest longtime readers. Chapter 5 of The Attack Of The Lesbian Squirrels (Chapter 5: Billy Deploys An Attitude Adjustment) is where I had a bit of a brain freeze.
There are excellent authors who can create a five chapter, 78 part, story and subsequently hammer out the 79th piece without ever going back to tweak earlier installments. There’s a word for such folks; “awesome”. I’m just a newbie on the path of novel length fiction; this means I went back and tweaked bits and pieces of Chapter 5. It had to be done.
That’s where it’s going to restart; with a few “republished” bits of Chapter 5. Ideally, they’ll start hitting the ‘net tomorrow.
Don’t worry. Nothing big is changed, mostly I’m fiddling with the order of things. I hadn’t painted myself in a corner, but I was about to. When you’re about to drive off a cliff, it’s smart to change course before dumb shit goes down. (This is a lesson not yet learned in political circles.)
I think the cool kids refer to this as “defining canonical content”? How would I know? When there’s a gathering of cool kids I ‘aint there. I’m just a dude with a keyboard and two fresh bottles of whiskey.
Stay tuned for a bunch of squirrel content.
A.C.