This is a brief intermission in the saga of the squirrels while I get my head out of my ass and write it attend to other matters. In the meantime (and in keeping with my current “ignore politics when possible” policy) I’m providing a link to this video:
Why? Three reasons:
- I just bought another percolator. I’m super happy with it. (I’ll post about it someday.) This was meant as one of several options in my “grid down / zombie apocalypse / campfire cooking” coffee plan. Unexpectedly, I discovered I love the soothing sound of a percolator. It’s charming and pleasant. It’s an experience my trusty (and overworked) automatic drip machine totally lacks.
- This is exactly how squirrels wield the power of Abba! If you are of a certain age you already know the “Maxwell House percolator song” and you probably have a positive association. (If you’re too young; forget it. The video will only prove to you that 1960’s television ads were grainy and dull. Get the hell off my lawn. Take your post-consumer content recycled paper cup with that dipshit thermal sleeve to keep the hot contents from burning your fingers and get it the hell off my property.) For the target audience to whom I’m speaking; watch the video. It won’t take long. I guaran-damn-tee you’ll hear the notes in your head. The notes are already there. An odd duck of a blogger just resurrected them from deep in the recesses of your mind using a technology utterly unimaginable to the folks making the commercial. Unlike squirrels and politicians, I promise to use this power only for good.
- Go ahead and tell me that #1 has nothing to do with the #2 that a corporation put in my head. (See what I did there?) There’s a reason I love my percolator. It can’t be the “burn my hands on the metal pot” effect. It can’t be the “serve coffee so boiling hot it will implode your nuts” association. It can’t be the “waiting 15 minutes watching a fucking metal cylinder when I need my caffeine hit right now” feature. It’s the power of Abba in a different form.
Sometime, after I’ve finished spilling percolated coffee all over my lap and when the squirrel stories are launched, I’ll delve into the “K-cup / Percolator Unified Theory Of Coffee”. Dr. Mingo and I have discussed it at length and we’ve probably discovered the secret to all of life’s conundrums.
A.C.