Obamacare Bingo I

As I type this post a handful of robe clad deep thinkers are pondering the matter of Federally socialized medicine in America. I am cautiously hopeful that the Supreme Court can (and will) nudge the train back toward the rails. But hope is thin soup, if they do, I will be not merely delighted but surprised.

One of the reasons I started this blog was Obamacare. I doubted the true believers could exercise restraint before they went too far. I was correct. The 2009 Christmas Eve vote on Obamacare was so much overreach that if it has been written in a work of fiction it would have been unbelievable.  Here’s what I had to say about it:

The last time the Senate held a roll call on Christmas Eve was in 1895. (They lifted a ban on former Confederate soldiers serving in the Post-Civil war U.S. military.) What was the reason for the recent historic, first in 114 years, life or death, gotta’ happen now on Christmas Eve vote? World War I? World War II? The Wall Street Crash of 1929? Nope. It was a health care vote during a brief window of time when the Democrats had a solid majority.

The faithful were hell bent on expanding the Government’s control over private lives even they self immolated in the process. They did expand the Government’s control over private lives.  They did (partially) self immolate.  They haven’t given up.  They never will.  The show isn’t over yet.

A blog was not my first idea. My first idea was Obamacare Bingo. I made cards with some of the most insane predictions I could imagine. Off the wall, batshit crazy, utterly unhinged, “unexpected consequences” of socialized medicine. I intended to print Bingo cards with a ridiculous event in each square and distribute them to several friends. Nothing, no matter how utterly stupid, was too weird for the cards. That’s what made them funny. (Don’t ask, I’m not giving out the cards.) As the complex system yielded “unexpected” (to some) results the block would be marked. A card written years in advance would make swirling the drain that much funnier. Imagine the possibilities!

I’d check off events block by block until someone shouted “bingo”. At which time I’d… uh celebrate? (I never had an idea how I’d celebrate … only that foolishness would ensue.)

Think I’m wrong? How about this; one bingo block prediction was “old nuns and monks who work for a church will have to pay for one of the following; abortions, birth control pills, a sex change operation. Bonus if it’s a minor. Double bonus if someone gets fired or excommunicated.” It took less than two years for a kerfluffle about workers at church operated hospitals to hit the birth control mandate.

Ridiculous right? Yet I saw it years before Nanci Pelosi signed it so she could see what’s in it. Amusingly, I wasn’t thinking crazy enough. Could I have imagined a block that said “a Harvard law student will testify before Congress that birth control pills are too expensive. Rush Limbaugh will be hammered for making fun of her”? I couldn’t imagine it; too weird. But it happened. Once you create an unconstrained system there’s no limit to it’s inanity.

Alas, instead of making millions on Obamacare Bingo I wrote a blog. I’ve mostly ignored Obamacare choosing instead to whip the Volt like a red headed stepchild. Why not? The Volt is funny in a way that thousands of pages of minutiae isn’t.

So, will the Supremes kill my bingo game? I suppose the news will hit soon. But (before the Supremes rule) I’ll post part II with my theory that it’s not time to break out the champaign yet.