Last fall, God decided I was too calm and contented. I needed another cat to “stir the pot”.
Therefore, a kitten spontaneously generated in my woodpile. It’s almost certainly the offspring of an asshole Tomcat that hangs around sometimes. There’s no sign of a female cat, nor any other survivor kittens. The Tomcat ain’t answering questions.
I’m not sure if our kitten is the sole survivor of a disaster or he’s a lucky explorer who completely cast off mom and siblings. I presume he followed dad into a cold windstorm. I don’t know if this was an act desperation or a stupid thing a kitten did for no reason. His odds for survival were small; but once I heard him meowing from the woodpile he’d won the game of life. The world is his to conquer. Just ask him, he’ll tell you.
I was doomed. The critter took over our household! It was immediately “adopted” by Mrs. Curmudgeon and I followed suit. You can’t fight the power of cute! We fed the stray kitten and once you do that… you’ve got a cat.
I asserted the little cretin would be an “outside cat”. I posted about it in October:
Of course it didn’t stay an “outside cat”. Somehow, and I still don’t know how, the little bastard learned how to break into our house.
Our house is a drafty old run down farmhouse so there are lots of nooks and crannies. I’m shocked that a damn cat can ingress and egress but mice and such break in constantly (and some chipmunks, leading to the Chipmunk Battle of Spring 2026). I thought I’d patched any hole that would allow something as big as a kitten to pass. Apparently not.
I tried. I really tried. After tossing the critter back outside a few times and having it rematerialize in the house I gave up. I have no idea how the beast was doing his magic.
It’s less that it could get in through some hole and more like it could teleport. Besides, if God decided I needed a cute cat, who am I to complain?
Mrs. Curmudgeon and I spent the Christmas holiday with the little devil purring contentedly one lap or the other. It napped with me by the woodstove; heated by wood cut off my own land (at great physical effort). I couldn’t help but like him.
Sometimes it freaked out and tore through the house; attacking everything in sight. I even like that too. It terrorized our 100 pound guardian dog, who rightfully could have eaten it in one gulp; but now they’re friends.
My theory is the kitten was helping us avoid becoming complacent and immobile during the cold winter. Regardless, the kitten did (or has or continues to) make itself inevitable.
All that stuff is the background to a project I started in November, abandoned all winter, and finished last week. I set out to make a cat shelter (basically a doghouse for a cat). It was meant for the “outdoor kitten” lest he freeze his little balls off in the winter cold.
We have a similar shelter for our old retired barn cat. It is a very nice shelter. It has electric heat!
For a while the old cat and the kitten got along and shared the shelter. I took my time building a second shelter. It would be larger and more insulated and have a dual level “escape exit”. What feral kitten wouldn’t want an escape exit? (Partly I wanted to “learn” construction skills with tongue and groove wood.)
I was too slow. The kitten go tired of having a roommate. He elected to level up. He teleported inside our house! I don’t know how he did it but he did.
So I quit the project and let the cat nap by the fire. I got busy making sawhorse jigs. I’m easily distracted.
Anyway, I finally got the structure built. I have excuses for the delay. My shop is usable but unpleasant in winter. I’ve been through many weeks of travel and two colds. But mostly, the kitten was already in the house and snoozing by the woodstove, so why rush?
It’s an impressive, overbuilt, foolishly engineered cat shelter. It’s setup and ready to go. Our kitten could teleport outdoors and move in… but right now he’s asleep snuggled against our guardian dog. Knowing my luck that shelter will wind up occupied by something else. Disco wielding squirrels? A wolverine? Anything is possible.
I’ll post photos tomorrow.