This post was supposed to be typed into an Alphasmart Neo during a campout. It wasn’t. It was typed during a “campout absence picnic / dry run”. The campout idea isn’t dead; far from it! (Plans only truly fail when you quit trying and I haven’t quit.) In fact my progress is (given the circumstances) making me confident it’s all going to work out.
Over the last few years I’ve been “camping by Dodge”. A far cry from the rugged and awesome camping I once preferred but still a good thing. I toss a bunch of heavy but comfortable gear in my huge truck, drive somewhere pretty, and get my head back straight amid the trees.
Very quickly “Dodge camping” expanded. The truck was drafted to lug a battered utility trailer, first laden with a tiny homemade boat and later with Honey Badger (my Yamaha TW200 dirtbike). This isn’t the true wilderness experience I often crave but it’s pretty good. Look around at all the nutcases out there. How many are sitting on their ass bitching about Twitter when an evening by a campfire would soothe the soul?
“You can contemplate the universe from a glorious inaccessible mountain cliff. You can contemplate the universe while sitting on a tree stump overlooking a cow pasture. The “Universe” doesn’t care about the details and neither should you.”
Starting with “State and National Parks camping” gradually drifting into “dispersed National Forest camping”, I’ve been getting my groove on. Even so, I intended to expand my options. I wanted to camp from the motorcycle itself. From tiny Honey Badger this is no small feat. I’m no longer 19 and bulletproof. Had I become reliant on huge cots and large tents? Regardless, I’m no longer amenable to “sleep in your jeans on the dirt”. Peacefully and patiently, I pondered how to square that circle. More comfort means more gear which changes equations. Then again nothing is impossible. All is a matter of balancing opposing forces. This I’ve pondered to my own amusement.
Several times while I overthought things (but only in designated parks) I’d hear a rumbling Harley (or clone) come into the campsite. They’re always in groups or pairs. Like ATVs, kayaks, and horses, cruiser riders rarely ride solo. They’d camp from cruisers a few hundred yards away while I totally ignored them; so focused was I on my diminutive dirtbike.
Over the winter I took vast inspiration from C90 Adventures (who rides ridiculous things with a big smile on his face) and Some Guy Rides (who did the entire Trans America Trail on a CT125) and more recently ItchyBoots who’s wandering around Africa. (Last I knew she was in Liberia on a Honda CRF300Rally.)
One cold winter night I stumbled across HerTwoWheels. She’s a lot tamer than the globe trotting adventure beasts but also a gentle reminder that there’s more than one way to skin a cat. If a Harley bagger in Ohio can go camping what’s my problem? She finally got it through my thick head that any motorcycle can be used for camping (provided you have reasonable expectations). I was embarrassingly slow at that obvious thought.
My cruiser’s luggage rack had literally collapsed from heavy use a few years back. So it wasn’t easily pushed back into service as a camping rig. In fact, I did the opposite. I stripped off the pillion seat, the luggage rack, the sissy bar, and the auxiliary fuel tank (which were all shot). This turned it back into a more basic bagger. (No worries, my cruiser has earned its chops. A long time ago I camped from the cruiser at Sturgis with mixed results but I’ve also ridden it coast to coast with full luggage more times than I can count.)
This spring I shook things up. I decided to get a “before the collapse bike”. Not the Mad Max equipment you’re thinking. It was more about getting a used “basic” machine before every motorcycle out there is a wheeled laptop with payments.
After a few test rides (and a near mental collapse brought about by a Honda Goldwing GL1800), I picked up a 1989 Honda Pacific Coast 800. It’s a cheap serviceable oddball and I love it! (Act within the next few years if you want motorcycle bargains. I got a whole motorcycle for the cost of a few payments on a new tourer. This won’t last forever. The “cash for clunkers” mayhem that gutted the used car market didn’t affect motorcycles but “electronic mission creep” will!)
My “new” (34 year old) Pacific-Coast 800 was slated for its inaugural test campout in June. Choosing to allocate time elsewhere, I ran off for a few weeks. This delayed the campout but was a great vacation. (At Mrs. Curmudgeon’s wise insistence we “camped” in a rented cabin. Even so, I spent plenty of time outdoors. I actually trailered Honey Badger to the cabin for a few pleasant day trips.)
The next campout plan was Independence Day. Unfortunately, I was knocked flat in a NyQuil haze. These things happen. The next plan was this weekend. Alas, I’d “let slide” several weeks worth of homestead chores. Also, I was still on the mend from a cold.
So I did the next best thing. I did a “test run” picnic. This soothed the soul nearly as well as a real campout but got my still sniffling body back home by nightfall. Also it was a good dry run of some gear.
Just look at that silly bike! It’s absolutely ridiculous looking if you expect “standard design”. Yet there I was having a picnic without the slightest hassle. If the silly bike did all I needed completely flawlessly then it’s not silly.
Having experimented a bit, how do I think an “antique” PC-800 work for a basic campout?
Superbly!
The cargo area is a “bedonkadonk”. I filled one half just to see what fit. Here’s the empty “half bedonkadonk” for scale. (The grain bag is some sort of anti-mouse stuff that was in it when I bought it. I’ve no idea if it works but my homestead does have a mouse problem so I left the stuff in there.)
A camp chair, a camp table, and a small cooler with a few cold sodas (too sick for beer!) all fit in HALF of the bedonkadonk.
It was easy! I could have packed plenty more if I put effort into it. (The tool set and bike manual ride on that side too.) To put a “half bedonkadonk” worth of junk on Honey Badger would basically use up most of Honey Badger’s capacity. While I was noodling around I found a “dome light”. Those geniuses at Honda thoughtfully installed a “dome light” in the “bedonkadonk” and I didn’t even know!
Here’s the stuff I was “testing out”:
I still had the whole other half of the bedonkadonk. Plenty of space for food and camping stuff (and a Neo). Incidentally, the chair (of the single “backpacking chair” I’ve physically found for sale I bought it) is pretty comfortable.
Here’s the chair:
The table (a gift from Mrs. Curmudgeon) works well too, though I think I assembled it a tad “wrong”. I’ll have to revisit that again in the future.
What’s the next piece of gear I need to get ready? “The miracle”! The miracle is a set of two free drybags sent to me by a reader of this blog. Thank you so much!
The drybags didn’t go with me on the picnic but they’re primed for use!
I posted a while back asking for advice about dry bags. An awesome reader sent me two dry bags that he no longer uses. What a nice thing to do! Goodwill like that that gives me hope in humanity.
During my vacation I was near “civilization” so I picked up some RokStraps to go with my “new” dry bags. I couldn’t find RokStraps in physical presence within 100 miles of my house! I literally carried empty dry bags into a bike shop a zillion miles from my house to check what size RokStraps I’d need. (I’d read about them but never seen them personally.)
I even tested the dry bags to see what they’ll carry. The smallest drybag is absolutely perfectly shaped to hold my smallest tent (with a little room to spare). My smallest tent isn’t ideal for motorcycles but it has a very useful feature; I own it. (It’s a Teton Sports Vista 1. I’ve had it a few years. Link goes to Amazon.)
The larger drybag should hold plenty of clothes and a sleeping bag and so forth. (A note about sleeping bags; I had a really cool Big Agnes sleeping bag with integrated pad but time snatched it away. It was properly stored but the pad deteriorated and has a zillion leaks. I think it’s toast. The sleeping bag and air mattress are both out of production so a replacement pad isn’t possible. Being prepared “now” doesn’t mean your ass is covered for the entire “future”. I think I bought the bag in 2009 so I got my use out of it.)
I’m sure the two drybags that should hold all the gear I’ll need and I’ve tested them too. Oddly, I’ve tested them not on a bike but on a trailer. Returning from my vacation, I strapped them to my motorcycle hauling trailer as I hauled Honey Badger back from a rented cabin.
Did I mention I’ve replaced my nearly collapsed utility trailer with a purpose built motorcycle hauling trailer? Well I have! It’s slick. I’m not sure I blogged about it before but I’ll post more in due time.
The trailer was expensive but I expect it to last many years. It sure tows well. Unlike my long suffering utility trailer this time I deliberately got a small trailer. It’s tiny behind my huge Dodge but that means I can tow it with my wife’s diminutive hatchback or my other 4×4 which is slowly inching toward road worthy.
I may need that “small trailer” ability sometime; “Please bring the trailer, a first aid kit, and a bottle of Ibuprofen to the location marked by my SpotX. Shit happened and I’m not self extracting from here.” (Plan for disaster and be happy when it doesn’t happen!)
During my vacation I also picked up a small air mattress. (no photos of that yet.) Hopefully I found the right compromise between “old guy’s sore back” and “pack small”. The air mattress has an inflation bag (something that wasn’t invented when I had my Big Agnes sleeping system) but Mrs. Curmudgeon got me a sweet little inflator that’s practically a magic wand. The air pad won’t be as nice as my trusty and huge Teton XXL Cot (the best damn cot I’ve ever owned!) but it should be “good enough”.
I took a few photos of my “test run”. I typed this very post on the Neo (which was also carried on the bike). Then, because a true campout will have to wait, I came home.
Get out there and enjoy nature y’all!
A.C.