The following is one of the dumbest phrases ever uttered in the English language:
“Failure is not an option.”
Strike that infantilizing slogan from your mind right now! Quoth the Curmudgeon:
Failure is always an option.
Failure is a necessary step on the path to accomplishment. While I’m at it; lets drop a few more truth bombs. Someday you’re going to die, the Easter Bunny doesn’t shit chocolate eggs, and governments cannot tax a nation into prosperity. It’s wrongthink to type the truth in 2020, but it was once “common sense”.
It’s said the phrase was associated with the Apollo missions. I doubted it; because it’s bullshit. Smart, serious, hard working people intent on a true achievement (like spaceflight!) don’t bluff. Politicians and college professors swim in bullshit, but people of real accomplishment don’t have that luxury.
Failure is always an option. Deep at heart we know this. If you try to bluff reality, you deserve what you get. This is why politicans suck at almost everything. They make a living based on talking but not doing. They get their hands on levers of power that exceed their accomplishment and invariably drive things into the ditch.
Wikipedia indicates the phrase came from scriptwriting for the 1995 movie Apollo 13. That sounds right to me. It’s the husk of a greater, deeper, and more subtle thought process. Engineer says smart thing. Hollywood hack translates it into dumb thing that sounds heroic. Not recognizing true heroism, people repeat dumb thing.
Why am I telling you this? Because I risk failure all the time. Maybe you do to? We were not put on this earth to endlessly repeat shit we already know. (The Movie Groundhog day was not about how fun it was to be stuck in time!)
Every challenge undertaken is an opportunity to faceplant. Identify something you don’t know how to do… then do it. It’s a difficult process. It can get expensive.
Sometimes people laugh at my struggles. Sometimes they do this while chained to the exact geometric center of their comfort zone.
Such endeavors are out of synch with social media. When people post on FaceGram or InstaBook they only show their successes… and often shallow ones at that. “I’m in Cancun. Here’s a photo of me standing on the beach. I sat like a sack of potatoes in a jet flown by an accomplished, skilled pilot. Here’s a photo of my food. It was made by a really awesome cook, who’s not in the photo.”
I keep many endeavors to myself. Why publicly document every last thing at which I suck? OK, if it’s a good story with a fun punchline that’s different. I’d post my own death by woodchipper for a laugh! But during the learning process I generally only post after I’ve climbed the mountain du jour… that’s my right.
However, it’s Christmas and we need a diversion. We just had a full year of self imposed misery… followed by the election of mystery. The underlying things that led to 2020 didn’t just magically resolve; so they will continue. Who can face another year of madness?
We need dreams… challenging yet attainable ones. How better to offer a light in the darkness?
But first… another digression!
A couple years ago I wrote about my tiny little sailboat. The story is in the “Walkabout” page; header bar, far left, “Spring 2019”. If you’re looking for a diversion, pour a cup of coffee and enjoy the trip. (I took that trip back in the before times when Americans were free. In long ago ancient 2019, hiding from the world in your house was a sign of mental illness. Now it’s mandated by various governors. Oh how those primitive people back then differed from us now!)
Here’s a picture of me camped on a beach with my little boat. (Can you see me? I’m the guy holding the camera.)
It’s a good memory. I share it with you.
I built that boat. Every fucking inch of it. It works! It floats and it’s properly balanced. It goes where my inexperienced sailing skills point it. It handles waters greater than what I expected from a craft that small; it punches above it’s weight class.
It was a time of quiet hoy. I camped in that tent, drank beer by the fire, watched the stars at night, and sailed alone in the day. I didn’t drown. The boat didn’t sink. Predictions of my demise went unfulfilled.
Everyone who told me to give up and buy(!) a fiberglass payment plan was far away. There were many who’d told me to quit but they were irrelevant as I drifted on the waves. I sailed the boat I made. I was Tom Sawyer. I was a 12 year old pirate. I was Captain Cook on exploration. I was at peace.
A crude boat of plywood and sailcloth came with fulfilment beyond what many folks will ever experience.
I felt happy. Because I’d earned it..
What’s not obvious from the photo is that the whole thing started out badly. I had three successive failures. This was my fourth attempt.
- I’d bought “study plans” for a Chesapeake Light Craft Northeaster Dory. I read every word but grokked the build exceeded my ability. (I’ve since “leveled up” and could do it.)
- I bought a traditionally built “double ender”. It was cheap and “in need of TLC”. I burned a lot of time and money to get it in the water. Alas, it exceeds my modest sailing skills like a tiger exceeds a mouse.
- I bought a little 14′ sailing dory. It was also cheap and in need of repair. My inadequate repairs didn’t work out. It’s carefully stored… on my lawn.
Fail once, fail twice, fail a third time, and then announce to Mrs. Curmudgeon:
“Fuck it. I’m going to try again. This time from scratch.”
She understood. She smiled and watched me charge off to tilt at windmills… again.
The fourth attempt worked. The little bugger sailed like a boss. I felt like a goddamn God!
I didn’t blog about my failures as I experienced them. I only posted the boat after I got the sails up. In fact, I only put the little boat online to encourage others.
If you’re thinking of building a boat… do it. Start now!
Recently I started another “project”. It is not a boat. Now that I have some basic boatwright skills, that flame has faded.
The new project requires skills I don’t have. I’m a shitty mechanic, lousy welder, and crappy fabricator. Yet, I’m trying to build a thing for which I have no formal plans. I’ve never physically encountered an example of the thing I’m making. I’ve never operated one. I only know it can be done… by people with more skill than me.
I don’t know if I’ll succeed or fail. That’s the point.
Normally I’d struggle in secrecy. Posting neither my failures nor my successes. That’s how I roll… and also who wants to look like a fool on their own damn blog?
But it’s Christmas and we all need to spur the imagination. So here’s a tiny hint.
It’s got a Hemi:
Wish me luck!
Merry Christmas,
A.C.