No sooner had I crammed cord #4 in my shed (and picked out a few trees to begin cord #5) the weather went ape. It was cold and I started burning wood instead of amassing it. It was still September: WTF!
Since the weather sucked, there was nothing I could do but cool my jets. I thought about the “too big” firewood conundrum and decided to build a go-nogo gauge. For those of you unfamiliar with primitive technology, it’s just a device to measure an object that gives it a pass/fail. They’re everywhere people need something like that.
I suppose most people’s main exposure to them is the little box at the airport gate where they’re supposed to check if your overhead luggage is the right size. You now the one I’m talking about, the one you sneak by because you crammed extra shit in your carry on and now it’s bulging like a football and you just know if those shitweasels take your carry on you won’t see it again this calendar year. Meanwhile some other lunatic is trying to bring a walrus as an emotional support animal. Ugh… I hate air travel.
I built it out of scrap. I used a 2″x4″ frame because stuff used around firewood gets mashed and bludgeoned pretty hard.
It’s not rocket science to guess the next step:
I have two wood stoves. The second is my beloved Betsy.
Betsy the woodstove. Yes, I named my woodstove. She’s earned it!
Old timey wood cookstoves have small fireboxes and awkward access. A rookie lesson is to cut and split some “kitchen wood” and the rest as “heat the house wood”. I’m sure everyone knew this in 1905 but I learned it just a few years ago.
I managed to avoid going down the rabbit hole fretting over the perfect radius. I think too much “math” and not enough “just get it done”. The end result was pretty spot on… also I had to restrain myself from touching up the curve, doing a little sanding, and varnishing… it’s a firewood measure and not a machine shop project. The inner geek comes out at times and the inner Paul Bunyan has to kick his ass.
The top is for home heat, the side is for “kitchen wood”. The box itself is roughly the dimension of the firebox. Also it’s a decent height to sit on it and contemplate. I suppose, it could find a third use if I’m out in the forest some day… but that’s yucky. (I know some of you were thinking about it.)
If I flip it on its side it’s roughly analogous to the depth of Betsy’s diminutive firebox.
Probably not the most efficient use of my time but I had fun and it keeps me off the streets. I hope it warms up again soon. I wasn’t planning on lighting the woodstove for months and it’s already going right now. Winter is looking scary this year!
A.C.
P.S. Other mentions of Betsy are below, I’ve finally mastered the percolator so now my shop has a cheery old timey stove and a coffee pot. Don’t really need it (the percolator) but I like having it.
- Cookstove! The Beginning
- Cookstove! The Middle
- Cookstove! Google Fu Challenge
- Cookstove! Nothing Is Easy.
- Cookstove! You Gotta’ Be Kidding
- Cookstove! Chimney
- Cookstove! Crossed The Finish Line
- Coffee Moment: Part 2
- Ideas That Can’t (But Should) Be Killed
- A Moment Of Grace: Part 3.5
- Firewood Update: Overthinking And Garageneering