No shit, there I was…
I was contemplating the possibility that my homemade mouse trap* was catching rodents in a series that mimics the Fibonacci sequence when I got an e-mail. “Would you like to win free…”
Trashed it. I’m a busy man with a mouse problem. Who’s got time to read e-mails?
Then, when I was writing a post about my irrational emotional attachment to a broken 30 year old alarm clock another e-mail arrived. “Dude, are you serious? Don’t you want free…”
Trashed it! When I’m pondering dead appliances I like focus. Who’s got time to read e-mails? (I might be paraphrasing a bit, I’m pretty sure it didn’t start with “Dude”.)
Later, I was sorting through my e-mail trash folder looking for an accidentally deleted comment about capacitors when I bumped into those two messages. This time I noticed the magic word. Ammunition.
I took all the papers on my desk and shoved them to the floor. I closed all open tabs on my computer. I set down my coffee mug.
I addressed the computer. (Yes, I talk to my computer. Don’t judge me. You do too.)
“Computer, you have my full attention.”
Ammunition. It’s what’s for dinner.**
If you subscribe to their blog you automatically get entered into a competition to win free ammo for a year. The deadline to enter is October 31st, 2018. Did I mention ammunition? Did I mention free?
Because they’re giving away free ammunition. For a year.
Boxes and boxes of ammunition. Shiny happy ammunition. For the very excellent price of free.
Now you might think I’m sharing this because I’m such a nice guy. Hell no! Odds of winning are based on the number of entries and if I were in your shoes I’d enter first and then launch the mother of all DOS attacks to keep other entries out. [Note: My dog just interrupted to point out that I’m joking and no, you should not electronically attack anyone. In fact, you should sing songs and erect statues in honor of sainted heroic people who give Curmudgeons ammunition.]***
In the interest of transparency I’ll mention that I’ve been bribed and I’m damn happy about it. Wideners tossed me a bone to advertise to my audience. I don’t feel one bit guilty because the bribe was also free ammunition and that means ammunition that’s free.
I just love when those two words are in the same sentence.
Wideners is now my main pusher supplier. As far as I’m concerned, the calendar is basically broken into awesome days when I buy ammunition and sadder days when I wanted to buy ammunition but couldn’t. So I’m more than happy to advertise online ammo sales. (Also the ammunition selection near my homestead sucks. I have to reload or buy online. Lets hear it for internet commerce!)
Click over there and subscribe to their blog. It may not have stories about squirrels and disco but it might win ya’ some ammo. What’s to lose?
Good luck.
A.C.
*My homemade mousetrap is called Curmudgeon’s Pit of Doom and works like something Edgar Allen Poe would invent. Which is cool with me. When Curmudgeons deal with mice they don’t mess around with “catch and release” traps.
** It’s not what’s for dinner but it is how you catch what’s for dinner. Plus every time I hear that phrase I think of steak so I like to say it often.
*** My dog interrupted again to point out that it never said anything about songs and statues, but I distracted it with a treat and hit “publish”.