Whenever Larry Correia (Monster Hunter Nation) does a fisking you should drop everything and read it. He’s a master of the art. It’s ballet, a tank driving over an inflated ego, a rainbow, and Christmas… all in one.
Some background:
A witless pseudo-intellectual text fluffer for the New Yorker (but I repeat myself) wrote a whiny screed about a new fast food restaurant that just opened in Manhattan: Chick-fil-A’s Creepy Infiltration of New York City. When some fool is appalled that Manhattanites have a different opinion about chicken sandwiches than his official one true path, you’re looking at an unteachable bubble dwelling pinhead. When he calls it infiltration you know the ensuing story will be a hive mind cognitive dissonance tantrum. One that’s equal parts a good laugh for us normals and also little embarrassing to us. When somebody commits that dense a verbal failure to paper it’s just a little unnerving to see it out in the open. Like maybe the writer needs handlers, or should get laid.
Luckily Correia is ready to do it justice. Go there now.
You’re still here? Why? Correia is the good writer, not me. Here are some quotes to nudge you his way:
Overwrought New Yorker Author: If the restaurant is a megachurch,
Larry Correia: It’s really not even vaguely close.
Overwrought New Yorker Author: the Cows are its ultimate evangelists.
Larry Correia: Holsteins are known for their devout nature.
Overwrought New Yorker Author: Since their introduction in the mid-nineties—when they began advising Atlanta motorists to “eat mor chikin”—
Larry Correia: That’s New Yorker Speak for “they put up a billboard.”
Larry Correia: I often see people describe rags like the New Yorker as “intellectual”, and then they lament how America is “anti-intellectual.” No. America isn’t anti-intellectual. The problem fucking halfwits assigning themselves a title they don’t deserve. There was nothing intellectual about this. There was no deep thinking. This was some dude having a public hate boner against a chicken restaurant in proxy for his unresolved issues.
And now I think I’m going to go get some chicken for lunch. The spite makes it taste better.
Seriously, you have to read the fisking to appreciate it’s true beauty. The New Yorker guy hyperventilates about everything: the decor, people who eat food they like, that chickens are not cows, that people who are not lefties use the word “community”, that chicken is fried, etc… Correia is there at every terrible utterance by that blithering idiot and smacks him hard with a verbal sledge of awesome.