I am slow in reporting this news of great import but my earlier experience (see: Poodle Vision) has had unforeseen repercussions. Apparently small axillary backup (the guest dog…tragically, a poodle) has infected our large domestic security unit (our family dog) with some sort of ear infection. I wasn’t there for the vet consult but I gather some sort of creepin’ crud got from one dog’s tongue to the other dog’s ear. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)
So now I’ve got to schedule a daily wrestle with my drooling yard wookie to shove some sort of outrageously overpriced liquid into her ear. She does not like it. I don’t like it either but I’m bigger than her; and it’s for her own good. Which she acknowledges daily when the ordeal is over by placidly wagging her tail and letting me pet her while I clean up the wreckage we’ve inevitably created by knocking over every piece of furniture in a ten foot radius. On the bright side we make great entertainment for the rest of the household; sort of like a furry/logger WWF smackdown in the kitchen.
Which brings me to today’s “ironclad rule of logically interacting with genetically engineered wolf by-products”:
“When dealing with dogs, if it can fit in a microwave; put it in one.”
(Note: this is not to say that the poodle was anything other than cute and pleasant…nor am I denying that walking a dog smaller than a locomotive has its merits. But a man has to stick with his morals and I say dogs should be huge.)
Update: I have been made aware that a similar law was established involving blenders. (What can I say? The laws of nature become obvious to all who observe.)